


Summer Girls

by gayerthanjew



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-06
Updated: 2012-06-06
Packaged: 2017-11-07 01:53:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 25,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/425609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gayerthanjew/pseuds/gayerthanjew
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brittany and Santana meet for the first time while working at summer camp.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Santana fiddled with the radio for a few minutes before giving up hope that she could find a decent station so far from the nearest city. She was less than an hour away from camp, which meant she was in the middle of nowhere and could barely get cell phone service, let alone a top 40 radio station. She resigned herself to enjoying the winding roads in quiet solitude. The quiet enveloped her as did the trees, growing close enough together to form a shady canopy over the road.

This would be her 2nd year working at camp, and she was looking forward to seeing her old camp friends again. They had kept in touch over the school year, but nothing compared to actually being at camp together. Especially since her camp friends rarely got on her nerves like kids at school did. Santana was also excited to have more responsibilities this summer. Last year she had been a "junior counselor" (which had really just made her the senior staff members' bitch), but this year she was a full-fledged member of the waterfront team. More specifically, part of the life guarding crew.

Santana found something peaceful in being a lifeguard, even though most found it a stressful job. She loved to swim and the idea of protecting a bunch of kids gave her a sense of importance she struggled to find elsewhere. And of course, the awesome tan she got from sitting out in the sun all day didn't hurt, either.

The paved road turned to dirt and after a few minutes Santana pulled into the gravel parking lot. She tucked her car in a back corner of the lot and stepped outside for the first time on her four hour drive. The humid air was an unpleasant shock after the coolness of her air conditioned car but she soon adjusted. She stretched smooth legs and toned arms, rubbing her back and neck to rid them of stiffness from having sat for so long. Leaving her stuff in the trunk (and a bag in the backseat that hadn't fit with the rest), Santana made her way to the main office to check in. Camp seemed quiet, and she wondered who else was here already.

After checking in with the chronically unpleasant woman in the front office, Santana had her assigned cabin number along with a list of other staff members working this summer. Her cabin was along a main path in camp so she would be able to drive her car up to the door to drop off her bags.

She drove slowly through camp, smiling as she passed memorable points from last summer. There was the softball field, where she had gotten her first base hit ever (after much coaxing to even step on the field); the dining hall, where she had prevented her fair share of food fights (ones she used to start herself when she was a camper); and then the lake, where she had enjoyed many swims and boat outings, and where she would be spending most of her summer. Santana pulled up to a cabin that was designated for staff only. Each small room housed two staff members – only for those who weren't directly in charge of campers.

Santana threw her hair up in a messy ponytail and started unloading her bags, excited not to be sleeping in a bunk with another counselor and 20 middle school girls. Each staff room also came with its own bathroom, a mark of luxury revered throughout camp. Santana smiled, remembering many summers of listening to her own counselors complain about not getting staff housing.

"Need help with those?" A smooth voice asked, startled Santana out of her memories. She looked up at the tall, dark boy already lifting the other end of a large duffel.

"Yeah, thanks" Santana smiled, as they lifted the bag up the stairs and into her room.

"I'm Dan" the boy offered his hand after dropping the bag at the foot of one of the beds.

"Santana" she responded, giving his hand a firm shake. He smiled at her before turning to go grab another bag.

The pair finished unloading the rest of Santana's things quickly, making small talk about what they were doing at camp this summer. Dan had also just turned 17 and would be working with the sports staff as an assistant basketball coach. He went to a high school Santana had never heard of, and was looking to land a college basketball scholarship next year. Santana couldn't help but notice how Dan's deep green eyes seemed to light up when he spoke about basketball. She also couldn't help but notice when he let his hand linger an extra second or two whenever their hands accidentally met going for the same bag.

She smiled to herself, well aware of the affect she had on guys. None seemed able to keep up with her though, possibly explaining the rotating door that seemed to be her dating life. Rousing her from her musings, Dan placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"C'mon, it's time for dinner"

Santana looked out the window and saw the sun was already getting lower, casting a gorgeous orange hue across the sky. Dan headed out towards the dining hall and Santana followed shortly after giving a quick glance back at her semi-unpacked bags.  _I'll have to move the car back to the parking lot after dinner_ , she thought to herself as she locked it, even though it wasn't really necessary.

Once inside the diner, Santana left Dan's side to say hi to a couple of her friends. She frowned inwardly at the fact that not as many of them had returned as she had expected. She knew a bunch of girls who were back, but really only considered Jen and Samantha to be among her good friends. The girls caught up on their school years as they dished out their first camp meal together, smiling and laughing at their adventures.

A lanky blonde girl Santana didn't recognized approached the table and Samantha waved at her, patting the empty spot on the bench next to her.

"Guys, this is Brittany, she's a dance instructor this summer. We go to school together."

Brittany placed her plate down and Jen introduced herself, shaking hands. Santana swallowed a big swig of her fruit punch and extended her hand.

"Santana" she said, more curtly than she had intended.

"Hi" Brittany gave a small nod as they shook hands.

Santana marveled at how light Brittany's hand felt in hers. She felt like she was shaking a feather, even though she could clearly see the muscle that rested under pale arms, connected to strong shoulders exposed via a white tank top. Santana realized she was staring and looked up to find Brittany's light blue eyes watching her curiously.

The darker girl cleared her throat and returned to her dinner, falling back into the playful banter with her friends that she had truly missed over the school year. Brittany ate her dinner in silence, only chiming in here and there when Jen prompted her.

* * *

Later that night Santana was unpacking her last bag when there was a knock on the door. She had returned her car to the parking lot earlier and had snagged a schedule from the office on her way back. There were some meetings to attend in the week prior to campers arriving, and she had training to go to, but otherwise it'd be a relaxing week.

"Come in" she called.

The door opened and Dan poked his head through.

"Whatcha up to now?" He asked.

"Just finishing up unpacking, then probably passing out. I'm beat"

"No you're not; you're coming out with us!" Dan opened the door fully and stepped into Santana's room, which she was happy to have to herself. A few more staff members had yet to arrive, but she was hoping to luck out and end up with a single.

"Where are you guys even going?"

"Well, we're not going anywhere, but Tom got hold of some booze" Dan grinned goofily, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Jeez it's only the first night. I try to wait until mid-summer before getting fired, Dan – you could too"

Dan made a face at Santana who had plopped down on her bed with a sigh.

"Lame-o" he rolled his eyes at her, taking a second before realizing he wasn't getting the girl to come with him. "Bye then, nerd"

Santana mimed throwing a pillow at Dan on his way out before falling back on the bed. The door closed with a loud slam and the hum of florescent light filled the silence. Santana paused and almost considered going after Dan. Even though her friends knew she was tired, she didn't want to seem like the wet blanket that would be in bed before 12 every night. After a few minutes of chewing her lip, Santana got up and turned off the light. She would have plenty of nights to be stupid later in the summer. She slipped into a baggy t-shirt and boxers, set her alarm for the next morning, and crawled underneath the covers, where she fell asleep within minutes.


	2. Chapter 2

Staff week seemed to go by in a blur. Santana spent all of Monday and Tuesday getting re-certified in CPR and first-aid and going over supplies in the shed next to the lake. Wednesday consisted of meetings regarding responsibilities and programming, all of which were tedious. Santana wasn't in charge of the actual planning herself, but her boss wanted her there. She realized she should be excited to be part of the decision making process, but she really just found herself yawning and covertly rolling her eyes throughout the day.

Thursday rolled around and it was time for her to put all her training into action. The waterfront director got only halfway through her speech to the staff about helping out the lifeguards before everyone was scrambling to change into their bathing suits and hit the lake. They didn't need to be told twice to go for a swim, especially with weather this nice.

Dressed in a green bikini under a loose tank top and short shorts, Santana climbed up one of the lifeguard posts stationed on the dock. She slipped on a pair of sunglasses and felt at ease as the sun warmed her skin, whistle dangling around her neck.

"Hey San!" Jen and Samantha shouted out as they jogged up onto the dock that jutted out into the lake.

Santana laughed and waved before gently blowing on her whistle.

"You guys have to walk when you're on the dock" She chided playfully. "But thanks for the practice."

The girls smiled and hung their heads in mock shame before jumping into the water. A few other counselors came out, some choosing to lounge on the dock, others jumping in to swim where Jen and Samantha were treading water. Santana kept a watchful eye on everyone with the help of her co-worker Tom who was sitting on a lifeguard post across the dock. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed two more people heading towards the group. The slightest wrinkle graced her brow when she recognized Dan and Brittany deep in conversation as they made their way up the small patch of beach leading to the dock.

As they neared, Dan looked up and grinned at Santana. From behind her glasses she watched as he turned to Brittany and said something, nodding his head in her direction. Brittany looked up and gave a small nod before her eyes darted back towards the ground. Santana wondered what they were saying and could tell the rush of heat to her cheeks was not sun-induced. She hated the feeling of knowing people were talking about her, especially in this case when she blatantly saw she was the topic of hushed conversation. It made her skin crawl.

Santana was now ignoring the people in the water, her eyes trained on the two walking down the dock. Dan dropped the towel he had been holding and called for people's attention. He postured at the end of the dock and kissed his tanned biceps before cannon-balling into the water, laughing at the shrieking girls when he came to the surface. Santana rolled her eyes at him but found herself smiling.

She felt her eyebrows rise involuntarily when her gaze fell on Brittany, who had also shed her towel on the dock.

The girl was absolutely stunning. Santana was about as confident as they came when it came to her body image, but she felt a twang of what must be jealousy in her stomach as she scanned the blonde. Her pale skin seemed to glow in the sun and even the tiniest motion caused the muscles in her back to flex. Brittany was also smiling as she stretched, pretending to need a warm-up for the jump into the water. Though unlike Dan, she did not need to call for people's attention. Her slender but toned frame, complete with smooth abs and legs that didn't seem to end, was enough to command the attention of everyone on the waterfront.

Santana realized she was staring again and sat back in her chair, shaking her head gently. Brittany dove gracefully into the water, barely making a ripple, and surfaced to join her friends who were now tossing around a beach ball.

* * *

Camp was eerily quiet that night. The director had given everyone the night off, saying they deserved a break after a long week of training and meetings. Jen had joked that it was the calm before the storm. Campers were going to be coming in on Saturday and after they arrived, nights like these would be hard to find.

Santana found herself sitting on a bench with a clear view of the lake; the only light provided by the moon that hung over the trees across the water. Once again she had turned down an invitation from Dan to hang out with everyone. She kicked herself for it and couldn't explain why she kept turning him down. He was really cute and sweet, even if he did go out of his way to make an ass out of himself sometimes. And cute boys aside, Samantha and Jen would be there. Her best friends who she never got to see outside of camp. Santana let her hair down and ran her hands through it, wondering why she chose the summer to start being a hermit.

"Hey there" came a quiet voice behind her that made her jump out of her seat. Still clutching her chest, Santana turned to see Brittany walking towards her.

"Jesus, you scared the hell out of me" She muttered, sitting back down on the bench.

Brittany grinned and sat down next to Santana. "Sorry"

"No you're not" Santana quipped back with a smirk, noting the grin on the blonde's face.

Brittany let out a small chuckle. A silence fell over the girls and they watched the lake and the small waves that lapped up against the beach. Santana grew uncomfortable with every minute of quiet that passed between them. She opened her mouth slightly, looking for anything to say to break the silence. Brittany beat her to it.

"So are you too cool to hang out with us or something?" Brittany asked, turning to look at Santana.

The question's tone wasn't malicious but Santana scoffed. Not what she had in mind for an icebreaker.

"Yep, that's it. I can't be seen with such low quality people during my free time. I have a reputation to maintain." Santana replied, putting on a mocking haughty tone while flicking her hair over her shoulder.

"Gotcha" Brittany nodded, turning back to the water.

Santana watched her, trying to get a read on the new girl. She waited for another question but none followed. She started to say something then hesitated. She wanted to ask what Dan had said about her on the beach earlier today but decided to leave it for now. Brittany looked over at her.

"But seriously, why don't you hang out with us?"

Santana sighed. "I don't know really. Just haven't been in the mood to be social lately. I feel less inclined to hang out when someone keeps trying to drag me into it."

"Like Dan's been doing."

"Definitely like Dan's been doing." Santana smiled at Brittany's observation.

"So you don't like doing what you're told."

"Basically"

"Let me guess, you also always want what you can't have, right?"

Santana thought for a moment, already knowing the blonde was spot on. "Yeah, I guess you could say that" She noticed the small smile on Brittany's face. "Something funny about that?"

Brittany raised her hands defensively but couldn't wipe away the smile. "Nope, nothing's funny. Just – trying to get to know you, Santana" she finished.

"I don't think I can be summed up with a few generalizations"

"I never said that" Brittany was looking at Santana, a smile still tugging at the corner of her lips.

"Good" Santana crossed her arms, battling her own smile.

Brittany stretched and yawned. She stood up and Santana admired her lanky frame in the dim light. The darker girl had always wished she was an inch or two taller, and found herself in heels more than she cared to be.

"I'm pooped" the blonde stated. "Wanna head back to the cabins? I'm in Seven"

Santana squinted at her watch, tilting it towards the moon. It was already 1:30. With a long day ahead of her, she stood up and stretched as well, noting how stiff her back was from the bench.

"Sure, I'm just a few cabins past you in Four"

The girls walked back along the main road encompassed in a silence that was fast becoming comfortable. Santana was still trying to figure out the strange blonde, but one thing she picked up on was the girl's tendency towards quiet. It was a nice change of pace from Santana's friends', and her own, typical non-stop talking.

They reached Brittany's cabin and said goodnight, both eager to get to their respective beds, knowing sleep would become a luxury in a couple of days.


	3. Chapter 3

"Careful!"

Careful. It seemed to be the only thing Santana said – or shouted, anymore. The young boy about to jump off the dock looked down and noticed the girl surfacing near his intended jump spot. As she swam away he shot Santana a sheepish look, waiting for her to give him the OK. She nodded at him and he proceeded to jump in.

Santana sat back in her chair, placing the whistle between her teeth. Careful. Once the campers had arrived, the word made a home in her vocal chords, never going too far. Even with the other two lifeguards on duty with her, her head was on a swivel, catching and preventing accidents like the one that could have just occurred.

With a different group of campers hitting the water on a constant rotation throughout the day, Santana rarely had a free moment. She chatted with her friends at lunch, but even then the conversations were rushed as they had to get back to their bunks' tables. After the campers went to sleep, everyone was too wiped to hang out. Even the usually energetic and sociable Dan stopped trying to get people to hang out after hours. Waking up early and crashing late was taking its toll on everyone.

One thing Santana was thankful for was the lack of a roommate. Sometimes she missed being able to gossip and talk about the day as she fell asleep, but for the most part she enjoyed not having to interact with someone so closely, especially when she came back from a long day on the water and just needed to lie down and close her eyes.

* * *

"How's the lake been?"

Santana picked her head up from where it had been resting on her arms on a table in the dining hall. She yawned and poured herself a glass of water as Jen and Samantha sat down across from her. At dinner the counselors were allowed a freer reign with where they chose to sit, leading Samantha, Jen, Brittany, and Santana to sit together.

"Tiring"

"You look great though," Jen commented. "You're so tan!" She continued, noting Santana's confused face.

"Jen, you're paler than a piece of paper, of course I look tan," Santana teased.

"She can't be paler than I am," Brittany held out an arm as she sat down next to Santana.

"But your freckles are so cute, Britt!" Jen laughed as she pushed Brittany's arm away.

"Yeah, Dan thinks so too," Samantha smirked.

Santana watched Brittany turn a deep shade of red.  _Well that was fast_ , she thought to herself as she bit into the sandwich she was holding. She couldn't say she had been flirting with Dan, but she almost felt offended that the boy turned to pursue someone else after only a week and a half.

"Guys, we're just friends" Brittany insisted. "He asked me for dance lessons"

"Oh, that's what it's called nowadays?" Santana smirked, raising an eyebrow at the blonde.

Jen and Samantha laughed while Brittany's blush only deepened. As if on cue, Dan sat down next to Brittany.

"What's up, ladies?"

Brittany buried her head in her arms as the other three burst into fresh peals of laughter. Dan watched on, wondering what about his appearance could be so hysterical.

* * *

The first full week of camp moved pretty quickly. Friday rolled around and Santana woke up to the sound of rain beating down on her window. She sighed, partially with relief and partially with annoyance. Santana actually enjoyed her job and was bummed the lake would be closed, but was also relieved to have a relatively free day.

She had a leisurely breakfast and cleaned up her room, which, without the presence of another person to be mindful of, had deteriorated into a mess. Deciding she needed to move around, she slipped into boots and a rain coat and headed over to the multipurpose building where activities were moved to in case of inclement weather. The building contained an indoor basketball court with a stage at one end where play practice was held. Surrounding the court were small classrooms and a few administrative offices.

Santana poked her head into the gym and found Dan leading some basketball drills. She stood in the doorway and watched as he showed a boy no taller than his waist how to dribble. There was something undeniably charming about watching him help the boy, and Santana couldn't help but smile at the sight.  _Careful_ , she warned herself, hesitant to become mushy due to the scene before her.

Dan saw Santana in the doorway and grinned, waving quickly before moving on to the next camper. Santana watched for a few more moments before leaving, not wanting to give Dan the satisfaction of an audience. She passed a few classrooms and did a double take past one in particular.

The door was closed but Santana peered into the room through a narrow window in the door. She watched as about 20 girls imitated, or attempted to imitate, their dance instructor. Brittany had her hair in a loose ponytail and wore a fitted t-shirt with baggy sweats and a pair of worn sneakers. Her cheeks were red but she smiled on as she encouraged the girls in front of her with some tricky moves.

Santana watched the blonde closely as she restarted the music, which was faint through the door, and proceeded to go through the entire routine with the campers observing her. The Latina found her eyebrows raise in surprised admiration at some of the moves Brittany made. She could see the girl was truly a dancer in the way the music guided her, every motion crisp yet also blending together into one fluid rhythm. After a minute or two Brittany stopped the music and looked towards the back of the room at what Santana assumed was a clock on the wall. The blonde's eyes flitted to the door, catching Santana's.

The darker girl blushed and took a step back as Brittany dismissed the campers and they poured out of the room. She stood awkwardly in the hall, not knowing if she should leave or step into the classroom, and not knowing why she felt so awkward.

"Santana! Come in," Brittany called out, making the decision for her. Santana stepped in and closed the door behind her. Brittany took a long swig from her water bottle and sat on a bench to the side of the room. Santana sat next to her, observing the slight sheen of sweat that covered her forehead.

"You can really fucking move," Santana commented, still wondering why she felt so intimidated by the blonde.

Brittany's face lit up. "Thanks! I've been dancing forever, so, you know. No big deal but…" She gave a little shrug as she trailed off, smirking as Santana realized her cockiness wasn't serious. Santana chuckled.

"Well, it shows"

Suddenly shy, Brittany blushed and tucked some loose hairs behind her ear. "I'm really not  _that_  good," she replied.

"Oh please, I look like I'm having a seizure when I try to dance," Santana said, even though up until recently she had considered herself a decent dancer.

"I could teach you! I mean, I'm sure you're a great dancer, I didn't mean to imply that you aren't, but if you wanted to practice or…" Brittany rambled on.

Santana chuckled again. "You mean you want to give me dance lessons like Dan's dance lessons?"

The blonde's cheeks reddened even more but she quickly regained her composure. "Well first of all, Dan is not getting "dance lessons", and second of all, Santana, I usually prefer my women red-headed. Call it a secret turn on of mine." She shrugged again, smiling as she watched Santana try to figure out if she was serious.

The Latina decided she was being serious and it made her shift slightly in her seat, suddenly very aware of the fact that they were alone in a classroom with the door closed. She guessed this observation didn't really mean anything and shook her head slightly. Santana realized Brittany was watching her with that curious look she'd seen before and she stood up.

"Can I get a rain check on those dance lessons?" She asked as she smoothed out her shirt.

Brittany stood too and moved to the center of the room where she started stretching. Santana watched as the blonde slowly dropped into a split and couldn't help but wonder if she was doing it on purpose.

"Of course," Brittany answered from the floor.

"Cool" Santana smiled and quickly left the room, leaving Brittany to stretch in silence.

* * *

The rain cleared up in the afternoon so Santana headed down to the lake and got a few more bunks in the water. The day went on like any regular day, except it was cooler after the rain – not that Santana minded. It was a nice break from the typically scorching summer days.

As she lay in bed that night she remembered tomorrow was her day off. She turned off her alarm, excited to sleep late in the morning. That night a blurred blonde figure danced through the dreams she would not remember.


	4. Chapter 4

The drive to the nearest town (if the four paved streets that intersected could even be called a town) was about an hour long and Santana wanted to get a jump on the day. After waking up and still feeling like she could sleep for another 5 hours Santana got dressed and went to Jen's cabin.

"Let's go slowpoke, I wanna get the hell out of camp" Santana prodded as Jen dressed.

"Chill out, Lopez. It's a long day of doing nothing ahead of us, no worries"

The girls walked over to Brittany and Samantha's room and found the girls already sitting on their porch with their bags packed. The blonde smiled at Santana as she stood up.

"Well, looks like we're ready to go!"

* * *

If Santana didn't love driving so much she would have spent more time worrying that people used her for her car. But she absolutely loved feeling the car accelerate under her command. Hearing the roar of the engine as her right foot gave it more gas. She accepted her friends' offers to chip in for gas, but she wouldn't have cared if they didn't. With the windows down and Jen's iPod turned up and plugged into the radio, Santana almost forgot there were other people in the car as she flew down a relatively straight stretch of road.

She was brought back to earth by the uncomfortable press of someone's knees in the back of her seat. Santana glanced in the rearview mirror at Brittany sitting behind her; the girl completely oblivious to her position.

"Hey Legs, you need some room back there?" Santana asked playfully over the music.

Brittany realized her knees were pushing into the seat and made an apologetic face before adjusting. "Sorry, Santana"

"Don't worry about it" The driver pulled her seat forward an inch or two to give Brittany some room.  _Her legs_ do _go on forever though_ , she found herself thinking as she glanced back in the rearview mirror. Brittany was looking out the window wearing a small smile, her blonde hair whipping wildly around her face. Santana could just catch a bit of Brittany's thigh in the mirror before the rest disappeared out of view. She saw the blonde turn to meet her gaze in the rearview and quickly returned her eyes to the road.

* * *

"This is just what I needed" Samantha sighed as she took a sip from her beer. Once the girls had gotten into town they stopped at the liquor store Samantha knew didn't card. After picking up two 6-packs they drove to the grocery store to pick up snacks before heading over to the park. They had seen Dan and Tom and a few other guys, but had declined their invitation to join them for a movie.

"Girls' day off, sorry boys!" Jen had trilled teasingly, waving a 6-pack at them before Santana grabbed it out of her hand and stowed it in the trunk.

Now they found themselves on a blanket under a tree in a quiet corner of the park, rotating between tanning, napping, drinking, eating, and gossiping. Brittany had brought a Frisbee and after bothering Jen enough, got her to toss it around. Santana and Samantha watched lazily on, enjoying the cool beer and the slight buzz it was giving them. Camp and the stresses that came with it seemed far away, tucked neatly out of reach by the snacks, beer, and beautiful weather.

The sun crept a bit higher before beginning its descent down for the night, tingeing the sky a light pink. Almost all the beers were finished and Santana was flat on her back watching the clouds through thin tree branches. Brittany and Samantha were reading trashy magazines next to her, and Jen had gone to find a bush to pee in, as the public bathrooms in the park had already been locked.

"Guys, the boys really want us to come hang out," Jen said as she sat back down, looking at her phone. "Dan just texted me"

"God they're so desperate," Samantha said with a grin as she sat up. "C'mon, let's go give them a pity call"

"I think I'm just gonna stay here, the beers made me sleepy" Brittany looked up from her magazine. Jen looked at Santana expectantly.

Santana kept her eyes trained on a small cloud. "I would, but I can't be fucked to move right now" She grinned as she felt Jen roll her eyes at her. "Another time," she added.

"Lame sauce. Fine, see you losers later" Jen said over her shoulder as she and Samantha started walking towards town.

"Don't leave without us!" Samantha shouted back to them.

"Maybe!" Santana called back, propping herself up on her elbows to see Samantha scowl at her. She lay back down and closed her eyes after the girls turned the corner. Brittany went back to flipping through her magazine. The quiet between them as they lay there was comfortable but Santana broke it anyway.

"Didn't want to make out with Dan in the back of the movie theater?" She asked with a smirk, her eyes still closed.

Brittany snorted. "Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was back in the 8th grade," she replied, closing her magazine. Santana laughed. Brittany continued, "What's your obsession with me and him anyway?"

Santana frowned and opened her eyes to look at the blonde. "I'm not obsessed with either of you; I was just teasing"

Brittany studied her and Santana returned to staring at the sky which was getting darker. Santana heard the blonde moving next to her. Thinking she was getting up to leave, Santana sat up to protest.

"Hey, I'm sorry, I –"

Her explanation was cut short by Brittany's lips on hers. The kiss was hard and urgent but gentle at the same time and Santana opened her eyes in shock before closing them; trying to process what was happening.

She was aware of the taste of beer mixed with chapstick on the other girl's lips. The smell of sunscreen and sweat coming off her skin. She was pretty sure a slender hand had come up to cup the back of her neck under her hair. And just as fast as the kiss had come it ended as Santana pushed herself back, suddenly feeling very sober. She stared at Brittany and wondered what her face must have looked like as the blonde girl opened her mouth to speak.

Santana just shook her head, wondering if that had really just happened or if it was some weird booze dream and she was still sleeping on the blanket; hopefully waking up soon. She stood quickly; fought for her balance as her head pounded from the sun and alcohol. Brittany stood after her.

"Santana, I –"

Still speechless, Santana just held up a hand and continued to shake her head. She turned and started walking towards the car. As she walked she pulled her phone from her pocket and shot a text to Jen and Samantha, telling them curtly that she was ready to head back to camp.

Brittany ran a hand through her hair and sighed before starting to clean up the remnants of their picnic.


	5. Chapter 5

She thought she was avoiding Brittany. She thought she was doing a pretty good job at avoiding the tall girl with the long blonde ponytail and longer legs. She thought that by avoiding Brittany, she was avoiding thinking about the softness of the girl's lips. Avoiding the fact that although the kiss had been short, she could still feel it; still recall it as if it had been burned onto her skin. She thought she was doing a good job – until she realized it didn't matter if she was sitting next to Brittany or if the girl was on the other side of camp. The fact that Brittany had kissed her was still on Santana's mind.

Santana also noticed that Brittany seemed to be avoiding  _her_. The girl rarely came down to the waterfront for a quick swim when she had an hour to spare anymore, and she made sure to distance herself at every social gathering and meal. In fact, most meals Brittany would sit somewhere else completely. The few meals she did sit with the regular group, she sat away from Santana and never spoke to her directly; barely even looked at her.

Santana watched her at dinner a few nights after their day off; Jen and Samantha were already talking about what they wanted to do on their next one. Brittany poked at her food, taking small bites here and there.

"Britt, what the fuck is going on?" Samantha asked suddenly.

The blonde looked up, taking her time chewing her food before swallowing.

"Nothing's going on. I'm just tired," she replied.

"Bull – you've been acting weird since our day off. What's up?"

Santana kept her eyes trained on the blonde, forgetting about the bite of food she had on a fork halfway to her mouth.

"Guys, nothing's going on. I've just been super busy working on this dance routine for the girls and it's exhausting."

Samantha looked at her skeptically but let it drop. Santana returned her gaze to her plate but could feel Brittany look at her before getting up abruptly to bus her tray.

"Uch Samantha now look what you've done" Jen chided as she watched Brittany walk briskly from the dining hall. She got up to go after her.

"Jen, I got it," Santana heard herself say.

The other girl raised her eyebrows before shrugging her shoulders.

"Go for it," she motioned towards the door.

* * *

Santana found Brittany on the same bench they had shared in the beginning of the summer. It was starting to get dark out and a weird sense of déjà vu settled over the darker girl as she approached the bench. She felt nervous and was annoyed with herself for feeling that way.

"Hey"

Brittany couldn't mask the surprise on her face when she turned and saw Santana sitting down next to her. She bit her lip and turned to look back out at the lake. Santana played with a loose thread on the hem of her shorts, focusing intently on it as she rolled it between her fingers. The silence continued to grow in length and tension and finally Santana looked up at the blonde, who was watching a speedboat tear across the lake.

"Why are you avoiding me?"

Brittany met Santana's hard brown eyes but stayed quiet.

"I mean, I should be avoiding you," Santana continued. "Like," she paused before lowering her voice. "You kissed me" The words felt bizarre coming off her tongue and out of her mouth.

"I did" Brittany replied simply with a small shrug.

Santana stared at Brittany, waiting for her to continue. Brittany met her questioning eyes, her own light blue ones calm.

"I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I just…I dunno. You're cute. I guess I was feeling confident after a few drinks. It was silly of me, and I've felt too awkward to be around you, hence the avoiding." Brittany finished sheepishly, blushing and looking away from the Latina's fierce gaze.

The wash of different emotions running through Santana only served to fluster her more. A girl had kissed her and just called her cute –  _no one's called me cute since the 6_ _th_ _grade –_ and the girl was kinda cute herself and –

"Am I interrupting something?"

Santana looked up at the foreign voice bursting through her train of thought. Dan walked up to the bench and stood by Brittany, his eyes questioning.

"Nope! Santana and I were just talking about how awful this camp food has been" Brittany said a little too cheerfully, standing and taking Dan's hand.

"Oh yeah, the stuff has been totally gross" Dan agreed, making a face. He looked at Santana. "You alright there sport? Looks like the food's gotten to you the worst" He joked tentatively, noting the look on the girl's face.

"Uh huh" Santana's mind played catch up with her mouth as she tried to figure out what was going on in front of her.

"Well go get some rest. Maybe go keep Samantha company tonight – Brittany's bed will be empt– ow!" The blonde smacked him on the shoulder with her free hand and rolled her eyes. Dan laughed heartily and shrugged. "See you later, Santana" he called as he gently tugged Brittany in the direction of boys' housing. The blonde's eyes flickered across Santana's once more before returning to Dan.

 _What the fuck is going on_ , Santana thought to herself, remaining on the bench. Just a few days ago, Brittany had kissed her. Two seconds ago she said she was cute.  _Now she's fucking Dan?_  Santana remained on the bench and turned the information over in her head before heading back to her room.

* * *

The next morning at breakfast Brittany sat with Dan. Jen and Samantha grinned to each other and made numerous references to "dance lessons". Santana rolled her eyes at them. She wished she could join their playful teasing but as she watched Dan wrap an arm around Brittany's shoulder, she didn't feel up to joking.

Her confusion had dissipated but its replacement was worse. A combination of jealousy and fear had settled in Santana's gut since last night. The fear was mostly a result of the jealousy. She had spent the night staring at the ceiling as she lay in bed, thinking about Brittany and Dan heading back to his room – the things they would  _do_  in his room – and she felt the green-eyed monster stir. And it had freaked the hell out of her.

She told herself it was over Dan. She was still pissed that he had moved on so quickly. She told herself it was over Dan. He was tall, dark, and handsome – and good with kids, which was adorable. Pressing her fingers to her lips she felt the kiss she wished she could get rid of, and she knew it wasn't about Dan. She told herself it was about Dan. Santana had cursed softly to herself as the digital clock on her dresser turned to 3 a.m.

She barely knew Brittany. The affect the blonde had on her was another cause for concern. Sure she was gorgeous and an awesome dancer and funny in her own weird way and pretty damn cute when she blushed and –  _she's a_ she, a voice in Santana's mind reminded her.

"San!"

Santana snapped out of her thoughts as Samantha waved a hand in front of her face.

"C'mon space cadet, it's time to clean up"

She stood up slowly with her dishes. Samantha watched her carefully.

"You ok? You were in another galaxy this morning."

"Yeah I'm fine. Just didn't get much sleep last night" Santana explained, giving Samantha what she hoped was a reassuring smile.

"Well you better be awake soon," Jen chimed in. "Some of my campers are coming down to the lake today, and they're growing on me. I'd prefer to have an alert lifeguard to keep them around" She smiled, prodding Santana's sides gently with her elbow.

This time a sincere smile crossed Santana's face. Eager to focus on her job she promised Jen that all her campers would return to the cabin in one piece. The girls bussed their trays and headed out the door to start their days. Santana's eyes swept the dining hall as they left and, to her relief, didn't see the girl she was looking for. Once again she turned her mind to the long day of lifeguarding ahead of her as she walked down towards the beach.


	6. Chapter 6

Santana flung herself into every activity she could with an unrivaled passion. On top of her regular life guarding schedule, she took on extra projects. Any boat outing that needed a lifeguard to accompany them; she volunteered to go out. Any class or training session; she was there to offer her services. She became an expert at keeping herself busy, both at work and at play.

For play she had taken to flirting with her co-worker, Tom, who she found was eager to return her flirtations. Santana rewarded his awkward charm on occasion with a few heavy make out sessions behind the boat shed when they had spare time. She basked in the envious glares the male staff shot at Tom when they walked into the dining hall together.

At lunch they joined Jen, Samantha, Brittany, and Dan at their usual table and Jen gave her a knowing smirk, tilting her head in Tom's direction. Santana grinned in acknowledgement and gave her a small nod. Her eyes darted to Brittany and felt a twinge of annoyance when she saw the blonde was giggling at something Dan had said.

"Tom, isn't this a bit of a conflict of interest?" Dan turned to his friend, working hard to keep a straight face. "You know, Santana looks pretty good up in that chair – what's gonna happen when a kid starts drowning and you're caught staring at her instead of the water?"

"I have plenty of other opportunities to, uh,  _stare_  at Santana, dude" Tom replied with a chuckle. Santana scoffed and smacked him lightly on the back of his head. She felt everyone's smiling eyes on her and blushed. She stole a look at Brittany and noticed the blonde was extremely interested in the mac and cheese on her plate. Samantha caught the look and frowned slightly.

"I dunno about you guys, but I could use some more mac and cheese. Dan, be a doll and go get us some more?" she asked, shifting the focus from Santana as people agreed, patting their stomachs in anticipation of round two.

* * *

Dinner rolled around and Jen and Samantha relayed some bad news to the gang. They had to stay in camp on their upcoming day off to help out with special programming. They'd get a day off that week; it just wouldn't be their regular one with everyone else. Brittany pouted and Tom offered to lend them his car when they got their day off. Santana frowned – their group was down to her, Brittany, Dan, and Tom. She thought back to her last day off and found she was nervous for tomorrow.

"That sucks, I've got the perfect plan for our day off" Dan said.

"Well clearly it'll be that much worse without us" Samantha responded, sticking her tongue out at Dan.

"Clearly"

* * *

Dan insisted on driving. He said he had planned the perfect day, and only he knew where to go, therefore he should drive. Santana sighed and called shotgun. Dan opened his mouth to say he'd like Brittany to sit shotgun, then thought better of it, having already deprived the Latina of driving. Tom got into the backseat behind Dan and Brittany sat behind Santana. Once again, the darker girl felt the uncomfortable press of knees into the back of her seat. She rolled her eyes but stayed quiet, trying not to think about the long, barely clothed legs attached to the girl in back of her.

The guys did most of the talking on the drive, taking no notice of the girls' silence. Brittany chimed in occasionally but Santana watched the road carefully, remembering how much she hated being in the passenger's seat. She got antsy as the drive stretched over an hour, especially since it was in the opposite direction of town. She was just about to ask where they were going when Dan pulled over into a little clearing that held picnic benches and a small shed that contained outhouses and a water fountain.

"You guys brought bathing suits, right?" Dan asked as he cut the engine.

"Yeah, but where's the water?" Santana questioned as she stepped out of the car.

"Oh, there's water. Don't you worry."

The group stretched their legs and picked their bags up out of the trunk. Brittany went to use the bathroom and Santana looked around, noticing a trail that cut back into the woods. It looked dark, with only a few bright spots illuminated where the sun got through the trees.

"'Kay guys, it's a small hike, but I think it's worth it" Dan said when Brittany returned. He started walking towards the path and Santana followed close behind, ignoring Tom's attempt to hold her hand. Her curiosity was piqued and her lack of control over their situation only put her on edge. The path wound through the woods and Dan kept a brisk pace. Santana could feel the sweat beading on her skin as her breath came faster. The group moved in silence, the only sounds a mixture of crunching leaves beneath their feet and panting from their tired lungs.

Dan stopped abruptly and Santana almost ran into him. She stepped to the side and lost any remaining breath she had. They were in a grassy clearing with a large cliff about 20 feet in front of them. A large waterfall reflecting the sun brilliantly was across the gap from them; Santana wondered how she hadn't heard it earlier. The roar of rushing water now filled her ears. She moved out to the ledge and looked down. It was a large but manageable drop down into calm bluish green water, the only ripples caused by the waterfall pouring into it.

"Wow" she murmured under her breath.

"Watch out!" Tom shouted as he grabbed her arms, jerking her forward as if he was about to push her off the cliff. She shrieked and he laughed as he swung her around, planting her back safely on the ground.

"Fuck you, Tom!" Santana shouted through a big grin, her heart racing.

Dan and Brittany laughed and sat down on a large blanket they had spread out.

"So, what do you think?"

"It's gorgeous, Dan. How'd you even find this place?" Brittany asked as she pulled her t-shirt off, revealing her blue bikini top underneath. She started rubbing sunscreen on her arms and Santana forced herself to turn her attention to Dan.

"My dad took me hiking out here all the time when I was younger. Before I even knew about camp. Just lucked out that it's relatively close by" Dan replied, his eyes lazily roaming Brittany's torso. Santana chose to look back out at the waterfall, finding watching Dan almost as difficult as watching Brittany.

The boys broke out food they had packed and the group settled down, absorbing the rays of sun accompanied by a nice breeze. Tiring quickly of watching Brittany and Dan flirt with each other, Santana rested her head on Tom's stomach and closed her eyes. He ran a hand through her hair and she pursed her lips. She wished she could like him. Truly like him. These past few days she had really tried, but a nagging feeling in the back of her mind wouldn't leave her alone.

 _Why is it that every time you show him any affection, you look over to see if she's watching?_  The pesky voice whispered in her inner ear. Santana knew why, and it only frustrated her more. Brittany was too busy hanging all over Dan to even notice Santana all over Tom, and it irked the darker girl for reasons she didn't want to think about. She stood up, shaking her train of thought.

"I'm gonna jump in," she turned back to Dan, pointedly ignoring the blonde cuddling him. "It's fine to jump in, right?" she asked, already sliding out of her shorts.

"Yeah, just jump out as far as you can – clear the rocks" Dan said.

Santana nodded and turned to face the water after kicking her shorts to the side. She smirked as she felt the group watch her shed her shirt and adjust her bikini. She took a few long strides towards the ledge and jumped off, curling her legs into her chest and wrapping her arms around them. The water was refreshingly cold as she crashed into it, opening her eyes momentarily underwater as it enveloped her. She broke the surface and pushed her hair out of her face, letting out a small whoop as she looked up to the cliff.

"Come down, it feels great!" she called up to Tom who was peering over the ledge. He disappeared but soon came barreling over the edge with a loud yell. Santana moved out of his range and laughed as he caused a huge splash. Dan and Brittany followed soon after. They explored around the waterfall and Brittany did handstands in the shallower section, drawing hoots from Tom and Dan. Santana rolled her eyes.

Dan waded over to Brittany and whispered something in her ear. She smiled and began climbing onto his back until she was resting on his shoulders with her legs over his chest. He turned to face Santana and Tom.

"Chicken fight!" He shouted.

Santana hesitated as she moved towards Tom. She glanced at Brittany, who this time was watching her closely. Santana's brow furrowed and she strengthened her resolve, continuing towards Tom until he was helping her up onto his shoulders. The boys walked towards each other and Brittany and Santana braced themselves as they neared. The girls grabbed each other's hands awkwardly and tried to push the other one off their boy's shoulders.

Not one to lose any form of competition, Santana almost growled as she wobbled on Tom's shoulders, trying to maintain her balance. He took a few steps back to help her adjust, and then advanced at Dan again. This time Santana got a good grip on Brittany's arms and pushed back. Brittany shifted her body so that she was pulling Santana as the darker girl pushed. The change in momentum sent both girls tumbling off the boys' shoulders.

Brittany got her bearings back first and continued to wrestle with Santana in the shallow end of the small lake. With a grunt of exertion Santana fought back, trying to get the upper hand. She managed to get on top of Brittany and pinned her arms down on the sand, panting hard as she looked into clear blue eyes. Brittany had her bottom lip between her teeth as she fought to get free, her eyes never leaving Santana's. The darker girl wanted to lean down, brush that stray strand of blonde hair away and – she felt her body shift slightly, whether accidentally or on purpose, she didn't want to know.

"Damn girls, we can leave if you'd like"

Santana looked over her shoulder at the guys, keeping her grip on the blonde's wrists.

"Well Tom you're welcome to leave but I think I'll stay" Dan quipped, not taking his eyes off the girls in bikinis wrestling in the water in front of them. Santana shot a quick look at Brittany as she felt the blood drain from her face and flush to her cheeks at the same time. She loosened her grip on Brittany's arms and stood up, turning to quickly walk up the hill that lead back to their picnic spot.

Brittany sat up and watched her go before standing to go after her.

"What?" Dan asked with raised palms as he watched the girls go.

* * *

Santana walked blindly up the path towards the car.  _Fuck these days off_ , she thought angrily. She chided herself for getting totally lost in those eyes, forgetting where she was and who she was with. Before crashing through the forest she had stopped at the top of the grassy patch and thrown on her t-shirt over her wet suit. Now she shivered as the cold and wet cloth clung to her body.

"Santana!"

She stopped in her tracks, wishing she could keep walking. Santana listened as the blonde walked up behind her. She felt the girl stop; felt her eyes bore into the back of her head. The darker girl tapped her foot, waiting for whatever the blonde had to say.

"What do you want?" Brittany asked softly. The loaded question hung in the air between them. Santana felt everything bubble up inside her. She spun around to face the blonde who had put her shorts back on. Santana balled her fists, digging her nails into her palms. She opened her mouth to say something but she couldn't find the words.

"I want –"

Santana stared at the girl in front of her. Brittany cocked her head to the side, blue eyes trained on dark brown ones. It was  _that_  look she couldn't stand – inspecting, quizzical, yet knowing all at the same time. Santana was angry and scared and tired and filled with a desire and suddenly she was grabbing her, barraging Brittany's lips with hers in a flurry of rough and hasty kisses. Brittany had her hands around her waist instantly and countered Santana's insistent kisses with gentle ones. Santana brought a hand up to Brittany's cheek, cupping it firmly as she pressed her tongue into the blonde's mouth. She put everything she had into the kiss and her chest tightened, calling for more air and a twig snapped behind Brittany and –

She jerked back from the kiss and looked over Brittany's shoulder searching for Dan or Tom but they weren't there. Brittany ran a finger over her slightly reddened lips and Santana looked back to her, startled, as if she had forgotten she was there; that she had just been kissing her like the world was ending tomorrow.

"Fuck" Santana muttered under her breath, gnawing at her bottom lip. She brushed past Brittany back to the clearing where Dan and Tom were drying off with their towels. They looked up at her.

"Where'd you go?" Dan asked.

"I'm not feeling so great. Can we go?"

Tom studied her with concern as Dan answered. "Yeah we're packing up – we can be out of here in 10"

* * *

The car ride back had been tense. The guys could feel the change between the girls; unsure of what had happened, only knowing it made them feel nervous. Dan kept glancing back at Brittany through the rearview but she paid no attention to him. Her head rested lamely against the seat, her eyes watching the scenery fly by. Santana still watched the road like a hawk, pointing slightly at oncoming cars and tight turns as if Dan wasn't paying attention to the obvious hazards.

Now Santana sat in her room, having declined Tom's offer to come over later despite her desire to scratch a certain itch she was developing. She undressed and got into the shower where she sang softly to herself as she lathered her hair. Her own voice soothed her, playing with the tunes and changing notes here and there, causing the rest of her body to relax under the water; her mind to zone out.

She stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around herself. She continued humming as she went back into her room to grab clothes. Santana did a double take and let out a few expletives when she saw Brittany sitting on her bed. Her grip on her towel tightened as she became painfully aware of the fact that she was naked underneath.

"You have a great voice," Brittany commented, lifting her eyes slowly up Santana's body from her toes to her eyes. Santana furrowed her brow.

"I think you should leave" she said in an even tone.

Brittany stood up and took a step towards Santana so that she was standing within inches of the girl. Santana turned her head downwards, unable to look at the blonde. She concentrated on holding her towel up.

"I will. But I don't think you really want me to. I like you Santana…maybe even enough to wait for you to figure stuff out. Because I don't think you like Tom. Or Dan, for that matter." Brittany's voice was soft and Santana scowled, feeling those  _goddamn_  crystal blue eyes trained on her, probing her. Brittany sighed and leaned in to place a chaste kiss on Santana's flushed cheek before walking out the door and closing it firmly behind her.

Santana felt the strange swell of frustrated tears and flopped down onto her bed. She stayed there for a while before slowly getting up and getting dressed, eager to fall asleep so she could wake up to the distractions of another workday.


	7. Chapter 7

Tom mentioned it while they lay in Santana's bed one night. Their clothes covered the floor, a messy map charting their hurried journey into bed. Santana rested against him, her head on his chest, one of his arms wrapped protectively around her. It was comfortable yet strange at the same time. She had wanted to shower; wanted to kick him out and have the bed to herself, but the news had her attention at the moment.

"You should talk some sense into Brittany, Dan's really bummed" Tom said.

"I'm sure she had a good reason" Santana replied, wondering what exactly the reason for the break up was. Tom gave a non-committal grunt.

"Besides, why are we even talking about this now?" Santana propped herself up on her elbow. "I'm gonna shower. You should probably head back to your bunk before someone notices you're gone." Tom groaned as Santana got out of bed and padded across the floor to the bathroom. He knew the Latina's hot and cold game by now, he just wasn't sure what set her off, or how or why or when. He heard the shower turn on and began getting dressed before slipping out of the room.

Santana showered slowly, making sure Tom would definitely be gone by the time she got out. She toweled off and got into a pair of boxers and a tank top. Her bed smelled like high school boy and she wrinkled her nose as she rolled over onto her side. This was only the third time they had slept together but every time had left Santana feeling…dirty. She was always distracted, or trying to distract herself, while Tom was in bed with her. It never took long but she filled her mind with images of someone else – if she tried hard enough she could even picture a gentler pair of hands on her, a softer body. The burning in her belly was never fully relieved and she was growing more irritated as well as apprehensive.

After gnawing her bottom lip raw, Santana finally fell into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

Little flyers sprinkled the tables at lunch the next day advertising a performance by Bunk 11. The whole camp was expected to be in the multipurpose auditorium after dinner to cheer on their fellow campers. Santana scanned the flyer and saw the small note at the bottom thanking Brittany Pierce for choreographing and teaching the dance.

"You going?"

Santana looked up at Brittany as she sat down across the table.

"I guess. I've heard the choreographer's awful though." She replied, a smile tugging at her lips. Brittany couldn't help the grin that spread across her face and Santana hid the rest of her smile in a big bite of food. She felt a small sense of satisfaction at making the blonde smile and stole a glance at the girl who was now talking about the recital with Jen. She noticed Samantha watching her and quickly returned to her food, the satisfaction of a second ago gone, replaced by anxiety.

The anxiety only worsened later on when she heard Samantha call her name as she left the dining hall. She was halfway to the multipurpose building when she turned around.

"What's up Sam?" Santana asked as casually as she could, not liking the growing pit in her stomach. Samantha closed the distance between them

"Um, this may sound ridiculous but…what – is there something – what's the deal with you and Brittany?"

Santana's eyes widened and she quickly put on an incredulous voice.

"What does that even mean, Sam?" she gave a forced laugh and looked around as the entire camp made their way from the dining hall to the auditorium.

"I dunno, Tom told me about your day off and I've just seen the way you look at each other," Sam pressed on as Santana blanched, the darker girl's reaction only reinforcing her thoughts. "And when you guys got back from your day off I saw her leave your room later." She finished it as more of a question than statement.

"Sam, do you realize how crazy you sound right now?" Santana postured less than convincingly. She could only hold her intuitive friend's eye contact briefly before looking away. Sam put an arm around her shoulder and opened her mouth to respond.

"Whatcha talking about?"

Santana started at the sound of Jen's voice.

"Just speculating on which songs Bunk 11's going to dance to," Sam glossed over smoothly, giving Santana's shoulder a small squeeze. Santana didn't realize she had been tense until she sighed and felt her body relax.

"They're probably going to do Lady Gaga or Ke$ha or something up that alley." Jen suggested as they began walking. Samantha smiled and wrapped her other arm around Jen's shoulders.

"I'm sure it'll be awesome whatever they do – Brittany's damn good at her job."

* * *

The show was pretty successful by camp standards. No one passed out or forgot their moves, and the sound system didn't skip. The bunk gave a big 'thank you' to Brittany and even managed to drag her on stage, where she blushed and took a small bow. The boy campers howled and wolf whistled for their female counterparts before counselors ushered them out of the building, rolling their eyes as they told the campers to get ready for bed. Santana, Jen, and Samantha had hung around, waiting to get Brittany alone to congratulate her. The blonde beamed as her friends patted her on the back, and she stole quick glances at Santana, who gave her a small smile and congratulatory nod.

The remaining group of staff members dissolved and Santana excused herself from any late night hangouts, saying she needed a good night's sleep. She returned to her room, going over tomorrow's schedule in her head. Not long after she changed into pajamas there was a knock at the door. Santana got up to open it and found Brittany standing on the porch.

"Hey" she said, the now regular barrage of emotions flaring up in her chest. She hoped her voice didn't reveal them to the girl in front of her.

"Hey" Brittany responded. "Mind if I come in?"

Santana paused before stepping back into her room. "Please," gesturing inside the room before she closed the door behind the taller girl.

"So, what'd you think of the performance?" Brittany asked, standing awkwardly in the middle of Santana's room. The Latina remained standing as well, not daring to invite Brittany to sit on the bed.

"It was really good. It looked like the girls had a lot of fun."

"They were a lot of fun to teach." Brittany nodded. They fell into an awkward silence that complemented their awkward positioning. Santana stared at the floor and shuffled her feet before looking up at the blonde.

"Why'd you break up with Dan?"

Brittany cocked her head to the side. "Who said I broke up with him?"

Santana considered the question for a moment. "Tom made it seem like you were the one who did the 'breaking'…"

"Oh yeah – how's that going by the way?"

Santana searched for the sarcasm in the question but couldn't find it. She frowned and felt Brittany move towards her; felt her body tense. Brittany tucked a strand of hair that had fallen across Santana's face behind her ear. Her touch felt like fire on Santana's skin and the darker girl turned her head sideways, unable to handle the close proximity though her feet remained rooted in their place.

"I broke up with him," Brittany murmured, her hand lingering on Santana's face, tracing her jaw line. "Because it isn't fair to him."

"What isn't fair?" Santana breathed, her eyes cast downwards.

"This," Brittany whispered, almost exasperated, as she turned Santana's head towards hers, leaned in, and kissed her. Santana exhaled a breath she hadn't realized she was holding and her hands found Brittany's waist, torn between pushing away and pulling closer. The pounding in her chest and the burning in her stomach held her there, melded her body against Brittany's.

Without breaking the kiss the blonde took a guiding step forward and Santana felt herself lowering down onto her bed. She felt the panic rise like bile in her throat but felt something stronger keep her on the bed, keep her under the girl straddling her. Brittany pulled back in need of air.

"You ok?" she asked breathily, her blue eyes concerned yet confident as they searched Santana's. Santana closed her eyes, unable to meet Brittany's. She nodded carefully, giving over to her body's response and trying to tune out the screaming of alarm bells in her mind. Brittany leaned back down and Santana greeted her with a hard kiss, nipping at her upper lip. She felt a tug at her shirt and complied, helping Brittany pull it off.

Santana watched as Brittany pulled her own shirt off, marveling at taut abs and full breasts freed from her bra. She crossed her arms over her own chest; the small scars from her surgery suddenly feeling more noticeable than ever. She had gotten it done over a year ago and only now for the first time felt self-conscious.

Brittany moved Santana's arms gently and ran a hand over each scar. She saw the darker girl flinch under her touch and stopped, replacing her hand with her mouth. She took a nipple between her teeth and Santana gasped. Brittany moved to the other one, flicking the hardened peak with her tongue. She kissed up Santana's chest, lingering over her collarbone and neck before returning to her lips. She wedged a leg between Santana's, pressing her thigh up against her through her shorts. Santana moaned into Brittany's mouth and pushed down on her leg, desperate for more friction.

"Please" Santana let out in a groan, knowing what she wanted but unable to ask.

Understanding, Brittany slipped a hand under the elastic waistband of Santana's pajama shorts. Her fingers slid easily through Santana's folds, getting a feel for the girl as she whimpered beneath her. Santana wound her hands through Brittany's hair, gripping her tightly as her tongue explored her mouth. She broke her grasp as Brittany pushed two fingers inside of her causing her to curse under her breath and squeeze her eyes closed. The blonde nipped and kissed at Santana's ear and neck as she thrust into her, Santana's heavy breaths falling in her ear, spurring her on. The darker girl fisted her sheets and her breathing came in quicker gasps. Brittany brought her thumb down over Santana's clit and with a few more strokes Santana could have sworn she saw bursts of light – stars even – as she came crashing over the edge.

She was vaguely aware of the blonde rolling off her and onto the small sliver of bed next to her. She was more aware of the small tingles still shooting through her trembling body; the way her chest heaved as she remembered to breathe. Santana rested a hand on her stomach, running it up to her chest where she found the scars. She always forgot they were there.

Brittany leaned over and kissed Santana on the cheek while taking her hand in hers. She watched the darker girl carefully before opening her mouth.

"When'd you get it done?"

Santana's brow creased.

"The very beginning of last summer," Santana murmured, lacing her fingers with Brittany's, ignoring the alarm bells that were growing loud again. She waited for the next question but it didn't follow.

"Aren't you going to ask me why I did it?"

"I figured you would tell me if you wanted to."

Santana kept her eyes trained on the ceiling. "I kept telling myself it was for me; I liked the way they looked when the doctor showed me an altered picture…but it wasn't for me. Well, it was for attention; I wanted to be noticed. Which I guess is for me, but…" she trailed off. Again, she waited for a comment, judgmental or rationalizing. Instead, she felt Brittany's hand under her chin, turning her to face the blonde. Soft lips covered her own briefly.

"You're beautiful"

Santana stayed quiet. After a few moments Brittany sat up, scanning the floor for her shirt. She leaned over Santana and managed to grab it off the ground. Santana watched her as she stretched out over her, her breasts brushing against the covers Santana had pulled up; her back flexing as she balanced herself while leaning over.

 _You're the beautiful one_ , a voice in her head told Brittany, her lips not getting the memo. The blonde pulled her shirt on and readjusted her ponytail.

"Do you want me to stay or go?"

They both knew the question was rhetorical and Santana hated it. Santana closed her eyes, feeling Brittany's on her. She had to ask it, and Santana had to answer. The Latina rolled onto her side, facing Brittany, her eyes still closed.

"I want you to stay."

She felt the springs in the mattress shift under Brittany as she lay down. Santana rolled onto her other side, turning her back to the blonde. Her eyes opened as she felt Brittany's hand snake over her side and come to rest on her stomach; felt her body press against hers. Comparisons between tonight and the night before plagued her and she shivered when the nagging thought  _'they don't even compare'_ ran through her placed a kiss on her shoulder blade and Santana relaxed, noticing the exhaustion that had overtaken her.

She fought the sleep pressing heavily on her eyelids and listened as Brittany's breathing slowed. For a moment she chased after the fleeting desire to escape – to get out of bed and run to her car, to drive somewhere – anywhere. Or even to just slip from her bed and pass out on the spare one across the room. Santana shook the thought from her head, not sure she could move from this spot even if she wanted to.

Brittany sighed in her sleep against Santana's back and the darker girl closed her eyes, hoping she could fall asleep before she had time to do any more thinking.


	8. Chapter 8

_Shit._

Santana shifted in her chair on the dock and looked at Tom before looking back towards the beach.

"Shit" she muttered under her breath when she confirmed it was Brittany walking towards her. It would be hard to mistake the tall blonde with anyone else, but Santana had hoped she had made that error. Santana chewed on the whistle between her teeth and returned her gaze to the kids in the water.  _Focus_ , she reminded herself.

Focusing was easier said than done as she could still see the blonde walking towards her out of the corner of her eye. Santana had left Brittany in bed early that morning (after setting an alarm to ensure Brittany was up for breakfast), unable to stand the silence punctured only by the other girl's light snores. Brittany's arm had felt unbearably heavy resting over her stomach and Santana's mind had chased itself in circles, creating a panicky tornado of thoughts that drove her from bed.

Breakfast had been fine, mostly because Santana ate in record time, claiming she needed to get a head start on setting up the waterfront. She had barely looked at Brittany, and only made herself feel worse when she grabbed Tom, yanking him out of the dining hall and down to the lake for a quick make out session behind the boat shed. Seeking answers in his lips she would never find, Santana felt guilt and anger tug at her stomach. She had kissed him harder, pressed up against his body, still looking for a spark, or some cliché bullshit that would placate her. Instead, the memory of Brittany's lips on hers had flashed through her mind as she felt Tom hard against her thigh. Santana had pulled away then, mumbling something about needing to get ready for the day, leaving Tom to cool down before he joined her on the dock.

Now, as Brittany became impossible to ignore in more ways than one, Santana felt the guilt again. She looked at the small clock hanging on the wall of the boat shed and blew her whistle.

"Everyone out of the water! Don't forget to check out with your buddy at the bench!" She motioned to Tom, silently asking him to handle the check out. He nodded and got down from his post before heading over to the small crowd of campers.

Brittany was standing next to Santana's chair, waiting for the girl to come down. Santana felt like a soldier surrendering after being surrounded by enemy troops. She came down from her chair slowly, not sure what to expect from the blonde. She was met with the girl's typical smile.

"I got permission to leave camp tonight!" The blonde grinned wider. Santana only looked at her, confused.

"Want to come out with me? You know, out of camp," Brittany continued, her smile faltering for only a millisecond before continuing to beam at Santana.

The darker girl didn't miss the irony of the question and felt a dull pang in her gut. Deciding it wasn't done on purpose and that she was just reading too much into it, Santana pushed the thought aside. She glanced over towards the beach and saw Tom was watching them.

"What do you wanna do?" Santana asked cautiously, turning her attention back to Brittany.

"It's a surprise," the blonde winked at Santana.

She smiled despite herself and knew she was going, even though her adrenaline was racing. "I guess so," she conceded with a small shrug.

Brittany squealed and bounced up on her toes. "Awesome. And don't look so excited," she teased Santana before turning on her heel and practically bouncing off the dock in the direction of the cabins. Santana watched her go before shaking her head and joining Tom on the beach.

"What was that about?" He asked as she sat down on the bench next to him, waiting for their next group to arrive.

"Nothing; just some girl stuff," she said, the weight in her chest growing.

_Shit._

* * *

Santana groaned as she stood in front of her dresser. Crumpled articles of clothing sat on her bed, the piles of still neatly stacked clothes on her shelves starting to dwindle.  _This isn't a fucking_ date _, Santana_. She ignored the other voice that responded, asking her so then why she was changing outfits so many times.

She finally settled on jeans and a nice scoop neck tee that revealed just enough. She styled her hair down since she spent most of her summer putting it in a ponytail. Santana was standing in front of the mirror putting some make-up on for her non-date when the door opened.

"Santana?"

Sam poked her head into the room before coming in, closing the door behind her. Santana quickly finished applying her lip gloss and greeted her friend.

"Hey Sam, what's up?"

Samantha looked her over, an eyebrow raising high on her forehead.

"Well look at you. What are you doing tonight, missy?"

Santana blushed under her friend's observation. "Going out," she replied vaguely, starting to fold up some discarded options on her bed.

"With Brittany, right?"

She was thankful she had her back to Sam as her eyes widened. It was stupid of her to think that Brittany wouldn't have mentioned it. Santana smoothed out a folded shirt and took a second to think about how she would play this.

"She told you?" Santana asked without turning around.

"Yeah, she's really excited; she told me all about it."

_Shit._

Santana swallowed hard and wondered how it got so damn hot in her room. She turned to Sam who was watching her closely –  _God why does it feel like everyone's looking right_ into _me_  – and gave her an eye roll and unconvincing smile.

"Are you coming with us? Want to tell me what we're doing? Brittany wouldn't say."

"It's just the two of you. And she made me swear to keep it a secret."

_Shit._

There was an awkward silence between the friends. Santana put a shirt back on the shelf and Samantha sighed.

"Well, you look nice. Have fun."

She smiled at Santana, a sincere smile that made Santana wish she could just blurt out – well, she didn't know what – but she wished she could just  _talk_  to her friend. Santana smiled back.

"Thanks"

* * *

"It's a good thing you agreed to come with me; otherwise I'd have no way of getting there." Brittany smiled at Santana as they walked towards her car. Santana just rolled her eyes, a smirk on her lips as she slid into the driver's seat.

Brittany instructed Santana to drive towards town and that she'd give her directions when they got closer. They made small talk for the majority of the ride; any gaps in conversation filled with comfortable quiet or Brittany's soft humming. Brittany had Santana turn left before they got to town and they ended up at a small dock on a lake Santana had never been to. She parked the car and got out, locking it after Brittany got out. She watched Brittany walk over to a small boat and felt butterflies in her stomach, surprised with herself that she even got this far without freaking out.

Amidst her nerves Santana couldn't help but smile as she watched the blonde untie the boat from the dock, her brow furrowed with concentration. She stood by the last tie and brushed stray blond hairs from her face before calling Santana over. The darker girl hesitated before joining Brittany and stepping carefully onto the boat. She looked at the small vessel that had what looked like a small room in the middle.

"Do you know how to run this thing?"

Brittany smiled as she untied the last rope. "Nope!" She looked at Santana. "Of course I do, San." Santana smiled to herself at the nickname, which sounded really good coming off of Brittany's tongue. "Well, someone kind of taught me, and I've done it once before, and – we'll be fine" she finished with a grin.

The blonde showed Santana how to start the engine and she went to the front of the boat which had an old fashioned steering wheel. After about 15 minutes Santana killed the engine like Brittany had told her too, and Brittany came to the back of the boat to drop anchor. Santana looked around for the first time, now able to pay attention to where they were. The boat was rocking gently in the middle of the lake and Santana could see houses sprinkled along the shore. After the roar of the engine died, the only sounds on the water were the occasional bird and the waves lapping at the hull of the boat.

Santana could feel Brittany smiling at her and turned to face her.

"Nice lake, right?"

"Yeah, it's gorgeous."

Brittany walked down the two small steps leading into the boat's room and came out with a bag and a sheet. She spread the sheet out on the boat's small deck and sat down, patting a spot near her. Santana moved to join her and watched as she pulled out bread, peanut butter, and an assortment of jellies.

"It's not much, but –"

"I love PB&J" Santana cut in, helping open the tough twist caps on the jellies.

Brittany grinned even wider if possible. "There's ice cream for dessert"

The girls ate their sandwiches in silence, watching as the sun dropped lower in the sky, coloring it with shades of light pink and orange. Santana never got over how each sunset seemed to be just as beautiful as the last, if not more so. She glanced over at Brittany and nearly choked on her sandwich as the blonde sucked jelly off her fingers. The sunset easily forgotten, Santana cleared her throat and took a long sip from her water bottle.

"It doesn't matter if I go swimming right after I ate, does it?" Brittany asked, not waiting for the answer as she stood up and pulled her shirt over her head.

Santana looked away feeling her cheeks flush and just shook her head, mumbling that Brittany would be fine. Brittany slipped out of the shorts she was wearing and started climbing down a set of stairs hanging over the side of the boat. She jumped the rest of the way into water, surfacing with a small shout.

"It's so cold!"

The darker girl looked down at the blonde treading water next to the boat.

"Come in Santana!"

She laughed. "You just said it was freezing, why would I want to come in?"

Brittany pouted and Santana sighed, more at herself than at Brittany.  _What are you doing?_  She asked herself as she turned around to unbutton her pants. Thankful that she wasn't wearing such a fancy bra and underwear, Santana climbed over the side of the boat and joined Brittany in the lake.

The girls chased each other around the boat, laughing when one caught up to the other. Santana splashed at Brittany who whined and dove underwater. She thought about their last day off and how different this time off felt. Just the two of them, away from watchful eyes of friends at camp…it was freeing. Santana didn't know why, hadn't even realized how heavy it was, but the weight on her chest seemed to lighten slightly. She took a deep breath which turned into a shriek as Brittany came up from under her in the water, hitching dark legs over lean shoulders before tossing the Latina backwards into the water. Brittany laughed and swam back towards the boat. Santana spit water from her mouth and followed with a huff, even though she was smiling.

Back on the boat Brittany handed Santana a towel as she wrapped one around herself. Santana noted how differently a bra and underwear clung to skin than a bathing suit did before realizing  _what_  she was thinking about and  _who_ she was staring at. She pulled the towel tighter as a shiver ran through her body, torn between the heat growing in her stomach and the cold of the air against her wet skin. Brittany noticed her shiver.

"Here, it's warmer inside. Besides, the bugs are gonna be out in full force soon."

Santana followed Brittany into the small room which contained a kitchenette, a futon, a few shelves built into the walls, and a narrow door that led to what must have been the smallest bathroom ever. Brittany closed the door behind them.

"Whose boat is this?"

"The head dance instructor's. She lives around here and let me use it."

"That's awesome." Santana sat on the futon, still wrapped tightly in her towel.

"Wanna watch a movie?" Brittany pointed to a small TV with a VHS player next to it on one of the shelves.

Santana nodded and Brittany popped in a tape which turned out to be some cheesy rom-com. They spent most of it making fun of the characters and bad acting. At one point Santana tentatively threaded her pinky around Brittany's. Their hands rested like that between them on the futon for the rest of the movie.

The credits started rolling and Santana found herself tugging softly at Brittany's hand.  _Wanting_  to pull her closer,  _wanting_ to touch her. It's not like she hadn't wanted what happened the other night; she admitted to herself she had definitely wanted that. It was just that this time, she wanted to make Brittany feel as good as she had. Hopefully without the panic, but she was more confident in Brittany than in herself in that aspect.

Brittany turned towards Santana who leaned over, letting go of Brittany's pinky to bring her hand to her face. She cupped Brittany's cheek and kissed her gently. The kiss grew heated quickly and Santana pushed Brittany down onto the futon, her towel falling to the wayside as she straddled her. Brittany leaned back a little and Santana frowned, pulling up.

"Santana…"

Santana leaned back down, not liking the tone of the blonde's voice, knowing what it meant. She bit her lower lip, pressing her forehead against Brittany's. She felt anxiety threatening to rear its ugly head and made to kiss Brittany again but the girl shifted underneath her.

"Santana" she said more firmly.

The darker girl closed her eyes. "Did you bring me out on this boat in the middle of nowhere just to talk about this?" she asked, her frustration lacing the question with an angry bite. She opened her eyes as Brittany sat up a little more, forcing Santana to sit back.

"No I –"

"Then please, just…" Santana trailed off, the anger gone from her voice. Her eyes searched Brittany's in the dim glow coming from the TV. Even in the dark, Brittany could see, and hear Santana's plea. Santana moved closer again, bringing her lips to Brittany's.

"Let's talk later," she whispered against hesitant lips.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Brittany kissed Santana back, allowing herself to be lowered once again onto the couch. Santana felt Brittany shiver as she ran her hand up her stomach, dragging her nails lightly across her skin. Brittany broke the kiss and Santana feared more attempted conversation, but the blonde only moved to unhook her bra and toss it on the floor. Santana did the same and brought her lips back down on Brittany's, intensifying the kiss as her stomach tightened.

She cupped Brittany's breast with one hand and felt incredibly awkward, having never really done this before. Well, there was that one time in 9th grade on a dare but that didn't count. She hesitated before flicking her thumb over both nipples, encouraged and emboldened when Brittany moaned into her mouth. Santana continued teasing Brittany before slipping a hand under the hem of her panties, pulling them downwards. The blonde broke contact with Santana's mouth only to help wriggle out of her underwear before pulling her back in for an intense kiss.

Santana's hand hovered over Brittany, lightly grazing warm skin causing the girl to arch up eagerly into Santana's hand. It was Santana's turn to pull away from the kiss.

"I – I've never really done this before, with another person, or girl, or whatever" she mumbled sheepishly, angry with herself for being what felt like a world class idiot. Brittany smiled and cupped Santana's cheeks so that she was looking her straight in the eyes.

"I'll be sure to let you know you're doing the right thing."

Brittany took Santana's hand and guided it over her center, showing the girl just where to touch her, letting out small moans along the way. Santana kissed up Brittany's collar bone to her ear, taking her time lavishing Brittany's neck with wet kisses as her hand worked in between the girl's legs. Brittany's hands found their way into Santana's hair, pulling her towards her for a messy kiss as she rocked against Santana's fingers. She bit down on Santana's bottom lip, her breathes coming in shorter pants. Santana picked up the pace and nearly lost it when Brittany let out a breathy "Fuck" as she came.

_Shit._

Santana drew her hand slowly from between Brittany's legs as her eyes fluttered open. Brittany sighed contentedly, causing Santana to squirm as the pressure in her lower abdomen seemed to grow even stronger. Brittany leaned up and kissed her before rolling over and pinning Santana underneath her. She started kissing down Santana's neck to her chest, reaching her abs, sinking lower –

"Wait"

Brittany looked up at Santana, her hands poised over Santana's dark purple panties.

"We should go back. It's getting late." Santana said, ignoring her body's screams to let Brittany continue. The blonde frowned.

"But, what about…?" She half pointed towards Santana's underwear.

Santana shook her head. "I'm fine."  _No you're not_. "Really." She added when the blonde gave her a skeptical look. Santana couldn't let her – she didn't know why. Brittany shrugged and stood up, picking her shirt up and putting it on. Her demeanor towards Santana changed, far from cold, but changed nonetheless. Santana thought she seemed hurt, or slightly thrown off.

Santana put her bra on and found her shirt. Her pants were still on the deck of the boat and she pulled them on, somewhat uncomfortable with still damp – from swimming, among other reasons – underwear underneath. They cleaned up their picnic and rearranged the small pillows on the futon in strained silence.

Brittany found the switch that turned on the outer lights and asked Santana to turn on the engine again. She brought the boat back to the dock slowly and hopped off to tie it back down. They cleared their things one last time and were heading back to the car when Brittany stopped.

"The ice cream!"

She turned and jogged back to the boat, running into the room and coming back out with two ice cream bars.

"You still want yours, right?" She asked, holding one out to Santana.

"Of course," the darker girl smiled, taking the ice cream.

They ate their dessert on the hood of Santana's car, swatting the bugs that danced around their heads. Santana swallowed her last bite and looked over at Brittany. She laughed at the blonde and motioned to her mouth.

"You've got some, ah, ice cream. Right there." Brittany licked at the corners of her mouth but missed the small glob of vanilla. Santana laughed again and Brittany wrinkled her nose.

"Where?"

Impulsively Santana leaned over and kissed right above the corner of Brittany's mouth, sucking at the spot of ice cream. Brittany smiled and moved to meet Santana's lips in a soft kiss. After a moment Santana pulled back.

"I had fun tonight – thank you."

"Me too."

Santana slid off the hood of her car and walked to the driver's side. Brittany sat down in the passenger's seat and reclined it slightly. On the drive back she fell asleep, her pinky linked with Santana's, their hands laying on the armrest between them. Keeping one hand on the wheel and both eyes on the road, Santana replayed the evening over and over in her head, only stopping when she was back in camp, falling into a dreamless sleep in her bed.


	9. Chapter 9

Santana let out a loud laugh before Tom quickly clamped his hand over her mouth, muffling the rest it. This only caused Santana to laugh more and Dan shook his head, grinning at the girl. Santana was drunk, and that was putting it nicely. She sat on the floor of a deserted bunk (it was so desperate for repair the camp had decided to keep campers out of it this summer) with Tom, Samantha, Brittany, Dan, and Jen. It had been a few uneventful days after her excursion out of camp with Brittany and she was happy to be hanging out with the crew, especially since they were drinking.

The bunk was on the far edge of a cluster of other cabins, but they still needed to be quiet lest someone came investigating. Tom removed his hand from Santana's mouth after the girl slurred something about being quiet. Now his arm rested around her shoulder and she leaned into him, her head resting on his chest. Jen sat next to Dan holding his hand between them. After making sure Brittany wouldn't be upset, Jen had made a move and they had been hooking up now for about a week.

An empty bottle of shitty vodka sat in the middle of the group. It had been half full when they started and although they had all drank heartily, Santana could claim responsibility for most of it. With every shot or swig Santana had glanced over at Brittany, looking for a reaction, almost daring her to say something; do something. Brittany had barely paid attention; too busy laughing with Samantha about god only knows what. Tom was all laughs and encouragement, as he was drunk himself and hoping to get into Santana's pants later that night.

The group talked about how they only had a few weeks left and how it felt like camp had just started yesterday. Santana quieted down and watched Brittany as she talked about dance recitals she still needed to help put together. The blonde had let her long hair down and was wearing her favorite pair of baggy sweats with a baseball tee. Brittany felt Santana's eyes on her and shot her a small smile all while keeping up with the conversation. Santana wished she could reach across the small circle and kiss Brittany full on the lips, her stomach tightening at the thought. Instead she slipped from Tom's embrace and turned to pull Dan close to her so she could whisper in his ear.

"Isn't she great?" she asked. Dan smiled a small, knowing smile at Santana, who didn't see it because her attention was back on Brittany. When he didn't respond Santana looked at him. She saw his smile and frowned before a memory hit her.

"What'd you say to her about me during staff week? When you guys were walking up the beach to go swimming with everyone else?"

Dan paused, recalling the tiny memory that had rooted itself in the back of Santana's mind since it happened.

"Oh! I just said that you were hot. She agreed. Too bad you don't swing that way, right?" He smiled, probably picturing the two of them if Santana "swung that way". Jen called his attention back to her and Santana looked over at Brittany again. She shook her head slightly and stood up, dizzying instantly.

"Whoa there," Tom stood after her, helping her steady herself. "Okay, I think it's time to get you to your room."

Santana just nodded mutely, flustered when the group chuckled at her unsteadiness.

"Party hard, Santana!" Dan pumped a fist, grinning at her as Tom led her out the door. Santana threw the middle finger over her shoulder and smiled when that got another round of laughter. Tom guided her back to her room and topped her after she lay down on the bed. He kissed her clumsily, his hands fumbling with the small buttons on her shorts.

"Tom, no, not now" Santana mumbled, pushing at his hands.

Tom kept kissing her. "C'mon,"

"Uch no Tom, not tonight" she groaned, now pushing back on his chest.

He let out a frustrated sigh and stopped, sitting up and moving towards the end of the bed. He stayed for a second, his hands on his knees, before standing up.

"'Kay. I'm done. I'm done with this. Fuck Santana, you're hot and all, but I want someone that actually wants to hook up."

"We've had sex before!"

"Yeah, a while ago, and it felt like you would have loved to have been anywhere else during."

"Fine. Get out then." Santana half shouted, rolling over onto her side, wishing the room would stop spinning. She heard the door open and close roughly as Tom left and closed her eyes, not drunk enough to ignore what the ramifications would be.  _There goes your beard_ , an evil little voice whispered in her ear.  _Fuck off_ , she thought back angrily. A few minutes later she heard the door open again.

"Go away Tom," she said dully, not rolling over.

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay," Brittany's voice surprised Santana. She rolled over to face the blonde standing by the door. Brittany took a few steps into the room. "I saw Tom leave in a hurry so…"

"So you came to see what? If we had a quickie? If I passed out? What?" Santana asked gruffly.

"Santana."

The darker girl turned over to face the wall again. She felt hot tears cloud her eyes, threatening to fall and burn down her face. She closed her eyes and brushed away the stray drops that got through. Her head continued to spin and suddenly she felt her mattress shift as Brittany lay down next to her, slipping an arm over her stomach and pulling herself closer.

"Tom and I are over" Santana said softly.

"I'm sorry" Brittany murmured against the back of Santana's neck.

"No you're not" Santana accused, lacking venom.

"I am," Brittany insisted quietly. Santana didn't say anything. "I am." Brittany repeated, a sadness in her voice that made Santana believe she was sorry for something else. Santana just shifted her position, choosing not to respond for fear of inciting more tears. She sighed with relief as she felt drunken sleep press down on her, giving in to the comfort and warmth of Brittany's body against hers.

* * *

"Santana. Hey, Lopez!"

Santana rolled over with a whine. Sam stood over her, pulling her covers towards the foot of the bed. "What do you want?"

"To let you know that you slept through breakfast."

Santana shot up in bed. "Shit!" She put her hands to her head as the room spun violently and the throbbing in her head doubled. Sam chuckled and went to get some Advil from Santana's bathroom. Santana scrambled to get dressed and gulped down the pills Samantha handed her with her water bottle.

"Calm down, no one noticed. Just don't be late to the lake."

"Where was Brittany?"

Samantha cocked her head at Santana's question. "At breakfast?" she responded, the answer obvious to her – the only question in her tone wondering why Santana asked.  _She couldn't have set an alarm for me?_  Santana thought bitterly, her building annoyance broken by the chirping of her phone. She flipped it open and found that an alarm had been set but had gone to snooze 3 times already.  _Of course_.

"Well then," Samantha said, her eyes still watching her friend closely. "I've gotta get going, just wanted to make sure you were up."

Santana was already rubbing sunscreen on herself. "Yeah, thanks Sam."

Sam nodded and opened the door, her mind churning.

* * *

The days rolled along mindlessly and Santana was thankful for it. It had been a few days since their little get together; since Santana and Tom ended things. Or since Tom ended things. She tried to play it off as a mutual break to keep her rep up – she couldn't have anyone thinking she got  _dumped_. Santana Lopez didn't get dumped. Either way, they remained cordial at best for the sake of working together, but outside of the waterfront their interaction was minimal. When Jen and Samantha asked if she was okay, if she wanted to talk about it, Santana just shook her head and smiled. She was fine, she said.

She didn't mention that every night since then, Brittany had knocked gently on her door before letting herself in and sliding into Santana's bed with her. At first she had just laid there, her arm snaked around Santana's torso, breath falling on the nape of her neck. Until one time when Santana rolled over in her embrace to face her, their noses almost touching as scared brown eyes searched strong blue ones. Santana had closed her eyes and leaned carefully into Brittany, her fingers threading through blond locks as their lips met. Nightly kisses became urgent and desperate, deeper and more breathless, turned into layers of clothes being peeled off, turned into hands and mouths exploring bodies. Conversation fell to the wayside and Santana took refuge in the sounds of heavy breathing, moans escaping lips; throaty growls. She lost herself in Brittany, in her lanky, strong limbs, in her wild tangles of blonde hair.

Now, after a long day, Santana sat on her bed, running her hand over still rumpled sheets, the previous night playing in her mind's eye. She watched Brittany bite her lip as Santana's now practiced hands worked her body. She could almost hear her breathy curses, the way she exhaled them sending shivers through the darker girl. She saw the blonde getting dressed in the early morning, tip toeing quietly, unaware that Santana was awake and hating herself for being too much of a coward to ask Brittany to come back to bed.

A familiar knock shook her from her thoughts and she moved to the bathroom to brush her teeth. She heard the door open and close and rinsed her mouth, returning to find Brittany sitting on her bed. She flopped down belly first next to the blonde who hesitated before straddling Santana's hips and kneading her hands into her back. Brittany smiled as Santana sighed, but her smile faded quickly as she remembered what she came over to tell the darker girl. She continued massaging Santana's back as she opened her mouth, picking her words carefully.

"Sam asked me where I've been sleeping the past few nights." She said as casually as she could. "She must have heard me come in super early…"Brittany felt Santana tense underneath her.

"What'd you tell her?" The question was terse but filled with anxiety.

"Just, out."

"Out." Santana echoed, muscles still tense.

"Yeah. She let it go but – Santana, what are we doing?"

Santana rolled over, forcing Brittany to slide off her to the side. The Latina looked up at the blonde, then down to the foot of her bed where she wiggled her toes, needing to focus on anything but those somber blue eyes.

"I hate lying to my friends. Or just not telling them things." Brittany added when Santana remained silent, watching her polished toe nails with disproportionate interest.

"I'm not gay." Santana stated, her face hard, still unable to meet Brittany's gaze.

"Neither am I," Brittany responded, not defensively, but simply, as if stating the weather forecast for tomorrow. "Santana, hey – look at me." The command was soft and gentle which made it harder to ignore than if it had been harsh. Brown eyes met blue. "I don't care about labels or any of that crap but I just can't stand the sneaking around. The pretending that  _this_  doesn't exist." She motioned between herself and Santana and it made the darker girl's chest constrict. It was too much.

"I can't." Was all Santana could say. "I can't. Not yet. I just –" She groaned and slid her hands around Brittany's legs, pulling the girl back over so that she was straddling her again. Her hands trailed up Brittany's legs, pushing at the short skirt she was wearing. Brittany licked her lips, still watching Santana expectantly.

"Brittany," it sounded as if Santana was battling – something, whether it was tears or something greater, or both, Brittany wasn't sure. "I really like you. I just…need time." Santana knew she was only pushing off something that grew scarier with time, with time to think and analyze and overanalyze until she needed to ask for more time. She dragged her nails up Brittany's inner thighs under her skirt, causing Brittany to inhale sharply. Santana paused.

"Please tell me you'll kiss me now," she added, sounding desperate and hopeful and charming all at once

Santana could see Brittany thinking and she hoped whatever conclusions Brittany came to fell in her immediate favor. The blonde's face was still serious when she leaned down to kiss Santana, but she smiled when Santana murmured an earnest "thank you" into her lips.

That night,  _to make up for it_ , Santana told herself, she let herself breathe Brittany's name into her ear as she came, her hands wrapped tight around the dancer's back.

* * *

Santana woke before her alarm the next morning and turned it off so it wouldn't wake –  _Brittany_ , Santana's heart jumped. She looked at the blonde still sleeping peacefully next to her.  _Fuck._  Adrenaline coursed through her body as she deliberated between waking the girl up and getting her out of her room before camp was alive with campers and staff or letting her sleep. Brittany was on her stomach, mouth open slightly on the pillow, her only movement the slow rise and fall of her back as breathed. Santana raised a hand to shake the girl gently, but could only place it lightly on her bare back and trace down her spine, hitting some freckles along the way.

"God you're beautiful," Santana whispered as she moved her hand up to brush some hair from Brittany's face. Brittany rolled over with a yawn and pulled the covers up over her chest, snuggling into the blanket. Santana pulled her hand away and felt annoyed with herself, hoping Brittany didn't hear her. She found her t-shirt at the foot of the bed and pulled it on before getting out of bed. She started getting dressed when she heard a knock at the door.

 _Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck._ Santana worked to get more than expletives through her head as she scrambled to come up with some course of action. To cover up the fact that a girl was naked in her bed.  _Fuck_. The darker girl stood frozen in her room, looking back and forth between the door and the sleeping Brittany in her bed.

"Santana?" The door opened slowly, maybe even in slow motion as Santana stood rooted to the spot. Brittany mumbled something sleepily and rolled over. Sam was halfway into the room when her eyes caught Santana's, frozen like a deer caught in the headlights. Confused, Sam looked at the person who she thought had been Santana in her bed and her eyes widened. Brittany was starting to stir, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

"I – uh – sorry" Samantha sputtered awkwardly before backing out the door and closing it.

Santana looked from the door to Brittany and back at the door. She put her hands to her face before running them through her hair.  _Why can't people just wait until breakfast to talk to me?_


	10. Chapter 10

Santana made a decision she hoped she wouldn't regret and followed Sam out the door. She thought to herself how it wasn't really a decision – she had no choice but to follow and try to douse the fire threatening to spread and engulf her. Her friend was halfway down the steps of the porch when she heard the door open and turned around.

"Santana, I –"

"Sam, it's not what you think," Santana's voice was borderline hysterical as she fought to get the words out. The other girl stepped back up onto the porch. She opened her mouth to respond but Santana cut her off again, her tone still unsteady.

"Like, it really isn't I can explain and before you go off talking to people about it I swear to –"

"San!" Samantha nearly shouted. The darker girl stopped mid-sentence. "San, it's fine. It's not a big deal."

Confusion plagued Santana's features as Sam continued. "You could have told me sooner, though."

"I'm not gay."

Samantha watched her friend carefully, understanding more than Santana realized there was to understand. A small smile crossed her face.

"Sleeping with a girl is kind of gay, Lopez."

Santana ignored the girl's smile; ignored the attempted playful comfort. She looked across camp and saw campers walking towards the dining hall. The darker girl got herself under control, steadying her voice into a harsh, even tone. She never took her eyes off the group of campers.

"Really, I'm not gay. I just, –" She shook her head. "I have to get dressed. I'll meet you at breakfast. And  _don't_  say anything, okay?"

Sam followed her gaze to the campers crossing the field to the dining hall. She sighed. "You know I'm still going to make you talk to me about this."

Santana put her hand on the doorknob, looking at Sam, her eyes hard and calculating. She ignored the statement, sniffed indifferently, and stepped back into her room.

* * *

Back in her room, Santana all but ignored Brittany sitting up in her bed. She moved to her dresser to pick up a bathing suit and shorts.

"What happened?" The blonde asked carefully as she rubbed sleep from her eyes.

The question fell on deaf ears as Santana hurried to get dressed. Her mind raced, unsure of whether or not that had all just happened.

"Santana!"

Santana stopped, looking up at the blonde. She was late, she wanted to get to breakfast; she needed to get out of this room. Santana's brow creased and she turned back to getting dressed. Brittany got out of bed and walked over to Santana. The darker girl looked up again and swallowed hard.  _Goddamnit, can't she put on clothes?_

"Hey," Brittany pulled Santana towards her, wrapping her arms around the shorter girl. Santana allowed herself to relax momentarily in Brittany's arms, resting her head in the crook of her neck. "You're fine. We're fine." Brittany murmured reassuringly in Santana's hair.

Frustration boiled up in her stomach. "No. No we're not!" Santana pushed back from Brittany roughly, leaving the girl with a surprised look on her face, her arms left hanging out awkwardly. Brittany frowned. Santana curled her fists tight, pressing her nails into her palms. "You need to put some fucking clothes on. And  _we're_  not okay, okay?" Brittany crossed her arms across her chest, still stunned by Santana's outburst.

The darker girl grabbed her things and headed towards the door. She looked back at Brittany. "I need to go. I can't deal with this right now. Just – I'll see you later." With that, Santana opened the door and hurried off to the dining hall, fighting the tears burning in her eyes that threatened to blur her vision. Brittany stood in the room for a while before turning solemnly to collect her clothes.

* * *

There was no knock on her door that night. No silent opening of the door, no shifting weight on the mattress, no tender hands lacing themselves around her body. Santana lay in bed staring at the door. She shouldn't have been surprised that Brittany didn't come over, but it still hurt.  _It's your own fault_ , she chided herself as she rolled over. After the events of the morning, Santana had worked hard to avoid everyone involved. Breakfast was awkward and she had eaten a quick dinner, skipping lunch altogether. Luckily it had been a packed day at the lake and she didn't have any free time to spend with her friends.

Now she was restless, wondering what Brittany was doing.  _She's probably better off_ , a bitter voice sounded in her mind. Eventually Santana began to wear herself down, letting sleep wash over her.

That night she dreamt she went for a swim in the lake but got caught in a tangle of seaweeds. The seaweed began creeping up her legs, slowly pulling her under the water. She thrashed with all her might, crying for help and taking in a huge gulp of water. Santana kicked and kicked until she was back in her bed, tangled in her sheets, soaked in sweat and gasping for air.

* * *

"'Kay guys, everyone on the buses!" The director shouted into the megaphone, making the announcement twice as loud. Maybe 3 times as loud, seeing as it was barely light outside. Santana groaned and filed onto the bus after a group of campers. She was excited to go to the amusement park – just not to go on a bus for 4 hours with a bunch of screaming kids. It was the camp's annual trip to the park and instead of getting a day off, all staff members had to be there. They were only on duty during the bus rides and lunch at the park; otherwise they were free to roam the theme park by themselves.

Santana moved to the back and sat with a group of older girls who loved swimming and often came down to the lake in their free time. Most of them were listening to iPods but she chatted with a few about how their summers were going. She noticed Jen and Dan get on the bus but they stayed towards to front and sat with each other. The ride moved smoothly with no traffic and the buses were pulling up to the theme park in no time.

Everyone was given instructions on when to meet and where before they were turned loose in the park. Santana looked around at the groups of staff members forming to enjoy the park and felt strangely alone. It had been a few days since the 'incident', as she referred to it in her mind, and she hadn't really talked to anyone recently. She caught a glimpse of Brittany and Sam and almost moved towards them before Jen called her name.

"Wanna walk around with us?"

"Us" consisted of Jen, Dan, and Tom, which was an awkward group to say the least. Santana and Tom hadn't done much talking for the second half of the summer, and Jen and Dan were being all coupley and touchy-feely. Santana weighed her options and shrugged, giving Jen a small smile.

"Sure"

As the foursome walked through the amusement park Dan and Tom argued over which rides they wanted to do first. The girls trailed behind them and Santana confessed to Jen that she really didn't like rollercoasters; regretting the confession immediately when Jen told the guys this news. They laughed and aww-ed and swore they'd get her on at least one, much to Santana's dismay.

Before it was time for lunch they had gone on the log flume and a small rollercoaster. Dan commented that their time spent in line for the rollercoaster was the best workout he'd gotten in a while because Santana had put up such a fight. The boys had held her in line while Jen apologized to people waiting around them. Tom joked that he had never heard so much Spanish before, and surely nothing that could be repeated in his Spanish class. Santana only glared, battling a small smile even though she was raging, and said she'd like to go get lunch if that was okay with her captors.

In the picnic area of the park the campers gathered and got their packed lunches. The on-duty staff members sat with their kids while the others found tables nearby. Santana, Jen, Dan, and Tom sat at their own table. Santana looked over to where Brittany was sitting with Sam and a few guys she didn't really know and her stomach turned. She ate her sandwich and tried to get into her friends' conversation, but her heart wasn't in it.

After lunch the boys wanted to go on some bigger rollercoasters but Santana swore she wouldn't even get close to them. Jen was torn, wanting to go with the guys but not wanting to leave Santana. The darker girl just smiled and told Jen she'd be fine. Jen protested a little, but upon Santana's insistence, she linked hands with Dan and followed the guys off into the park.

Santana took the rest of the afternoon to herself, strolling through the amusement park at a leisurely pace. She watched kids chasing after each other, and parents chasing after kids. It was nice to have time to herself, where she could wander and be distracted from her worries about camp and Brittany. Santana managed to lose herself in the crowds, letting them guide her through the park, but every so often she caught sight of blonde hair that jolted her from her thoughts. It was always someone else, a girl or woman who happened to have their hair up in a messy ponytail. She sighed and walked through a section of carnival games.

Santana's favorite game was the water gun one, where you had to shoot the target and race your character up to the top. By the end of the day she was the envy of everyone she passed, having won the large prize at the water gun game. Santana made her way back to the buses in the parking lot and fended off campers who tried to steal her giant plush puppy dog.

Exhausted from walking around all day, Santana got onto the bus and moved towards the back, putting her prize in the seat next to her. She leaned back in the seat and closed her eyes as the buses began to fill and get noisy with the excited chatter of campers. The sun would be setting soon and counselors ushered their kids on to the buses as fast as they could.

"Hey, make room for me over here."

Santana looked up and saw Sam standing over her.

"Where the hell am I supposed to put this thing?" Santana frowned and motioned towards the huge plush dog next to her.

"Just put it across from us – kids can squish together to make room for your prize." She shrugged and grinned as she pulled the dog from Santana's hands and placed it in the seat behind her. "Now shove over."

Santana rolled her eyes and obliged, even though she was sure she wouldn't like being trapped between a window and Sam for the long ride back. She stayed on the defensive for the beginning of the ride, waiting for Sam to bring Brittany up. To her confusion, Sam kept on talking about the theme park and her favorite rides, but Santana stayed tense the whole time. Sam must have noticed because finally she sighed, looking at Santana in the dim light.

"San, you can relax. Brittany and I talked."

Santana did anything but relax at the statement. "You – what?" She almost yelled before remembering that there were campers around, and that the bus had fallen quiet as most campers passed out on each others' shoulders, exhausted from the day.

Sam smiled reassuringly. "We talked. And she told me that you guys are hooking up, and it's fine, you guys like each other – that's cool, awesome, no labels, great." Sam held up her hands as she spoke, motioning that everything was fine and that there was no judging going on. Santana became very interested in the bus floor and how her shoes looked on it.

Sam's voice was soft as she put a hand on Santana's shoulder. "Santana," the girl finally met her friend's eyes. "Seriously, it's not a big deal. I'm happy for you guys, as long as you're happy."

"I hate this," was all Santana could manage, feeling the fear coursing through her veins. She looked back down at the floor. "Like, what the fuck. What am I doing?"

"Hey, San, it doesn't matter. Are you freaking out 'cause she's a girl? Dude, she's fucking hot!" Sam grinned as Santana let out a small laugh. "It doesn't matter – you like who you like," she finished, rubbing Santana's back.

The darker girl smiled weakly, thinking to herself as her friend gave her a little squeeze. Her features sharpened quickly. "You can't tell anyone though"

"Of course not! I'm not saying anything to anybody. I'm here for you. And Brittany." She smiled at Santana, who slowly returned the favor as the idea of someone else knowing about her and Brittany, and well, whatever they were, permeated her mind. She loved Sam and realized she could trust her, and that it might be nice to have someone to talk to about it other than Brittany.

It. She still didn't know what "it" was. But at least now Sam knew that "it" existed. And she was okay with "it". Supportive of "it". Santana nodded to herself and sighed. Sam smiled again after having watched her friend think things through.

"So…I was kind of a dick to Brittany," Santana told Sam.

"Well, I don't know if you've noticed, but Brit likes animals. Especially fluffy ones."

Santana smiled as she thought back to that time Brittany scolded her for shooing a flock of geese off the waterfront at camp, even though her boss made her do it whenever the birds showed up. "Yeah, I may have picked up on that."

Sam jerked her thumb over her shoulder towards the seat containing Santana's large prize. "You could maybe stop by our room tonight to make amends? I'll be out, uh, sleeping somewhere else."

"Oh really now?" Santana questioned, raising an eyebrow. "Where? Or should I ask, 'who'?"

The other girl blushed. "Mike – he's one of the waiters."

"Yeah girl, I know who Mike is," Santana teased, poking Sam in her side. "He's cute!"

"Duhhh. Why do you think I'm sleeping with him?"

Santana laughed again. As her laughter died down she looked at Sam. "Thanks, Sam." She said sincerely.

"For what, sleeping with Mike?" She laughed as Santana rolled her eyes. Sam shook her head, then met her friend's gaze again. "Yeah San, of course."

* * *

Santana adjusted the giant dog in her arms and managed to knock on Brittany's door. Santana had waited until camp fell quiet before coming over; now all she could hear was the loud chorus of crickets chirping in the background. She heard a muffled "come in" and swung open the door, not bothering to try and hide the plush prize.

Brittany was sitting in her bed reading. She looked up at Santana and put her book down on her nightstand. She greeted the girl with a neutral "hey", her voice even, not betraying any emotion. Santana held out the large stuffed pup.

"I got you something"

The corner of Brittany's lips twitched upwards. She held out her hands reluctantly and Santana gave her the dog before sitting on the edge of the bed next to her.

"You mean you won something and Samantha suggested you give it to me?"

Santana chuckled. "Maybe. Maybe I would have done it anyways."

Brittany was quiet and put the dog next to her on the bed. Santana looked at the dog for a few moments before meeting guarded blue eyes. "Brittany…I'm sorry. I was an ass. And I was panicking, but that's still no excuse. I'm just, I dunno. Freaked out. I've only liked guys before. Like,  _really_  liked guys. And now I really like you and I don't know what it means…" Santana could feel herself rambling and trailed off, hoping Brittany would cut in and save her from tripping over herself.

The blonde's features softened and she leaned forward. "It just means you like  _me_ , San. Which, by the way, I don't blame you." Brittany grinned and tossed her hair over her shoulder with a mockingly haughty flick. Santana gave a small laugh.

"I know. It's just still, scary. I know a few kids in my school who've gotten their asses kicked 'cause they're gay, and it just…sucks. To put it lightly." Santana shook her head, looking back up at Brittany. "But anyways, I'm sorry I was a jerk."

"I guess I can forgive you," Brittany smiled at the darker girl and rubbed her knee. "I mean, you did give me this awesome puppy. Whose name is Charles."

"Charles? When did you come up with that?"

"Just now. I think it suits him."

Santana chuckled and fell silent. She adjusted slightly on the bed. "So…now what?"

"Well, you couuuld kiss me? Maybe? I think that's always an appropriate re–"

Brittany's clever response was cut off by Santana following her first suggestion. She crawled over Brittany and straddled her hips, pressing her lips against the blonde's with a forceful purpose. Santana snaked her hands around Brittany's neck, pulling at her hair gently, tilting Brittany's head upwards. She moved from the girl's lips down to her neck, eliciting a soft moan from the blonde.

"I'm sorry," she whispered in between kisses. "I'm sorry"

Brittany brought Santana back up to her and held her face between her hands, staring into deep brown eyes. She smiled before kissing Santana gently. "It's okay. I know." She let her hands fall from Santana's face and wrapped them around her waist as she kissed her deeply.

Santana broke the kiss and rested her head on Brittany's shoulder, nestling into her neck. Brittany rubbed her back and placed small kisses against her hair and ear.

"Hey Brit?" Santana asked softly against Brittany's neck.

"Yeah San?"

"Do you think we can move Charles? I don't think there's enough room for the 3 of us."

Santana sat up and grinned goofily. Brittany kissed her again.

"I think that can be arranged."

Santana moved off of Brittany who placed the giant stuffed animal on the floor next to her. Santana slid under the blankets and Brittany followed. Santana turned in towards Brittany who wrapped her arm around the Latina.

They fell asleep easily that night, wrapped up in each other, their dreams light and inconsequential.


	11. Chapter 11

The next two weeks went by quickly. Camp was filled with an urgent energy; a buzzing need to get things done as the end rapidly approached. There were a few more rainy days which Santana used to her advantage. During the inclement weather she would spend most of her time in the multipurpose building – she'd spend some mornings shooting around with Dan (who was typically doubled over with laughter at Santana's atrocious basketball skills), but the majority of her time was spent watching Brittany's dance classes. Or, more accurately put, pretended to watch Brittany's dance classes so she could just watch Brittany.

Campers waved 'hi' to Santana when they found her sitting on the bench in their dance room and easily forgot about her while they practiced. Santana's eyes roamed Brittany's form freely, drinking in the blonde as she moved around the room. Brittany would toss her playful smirks, and one time even stole a kiss after the campers left. Santana blushed furiously as her heart skipped a beat and looked around quickly, making sure no one in the empty room had seen.

On sunny days Santana reigned over the waterfront, hellbent on keeping her record perfect – no injuries, no accidents. The only almost-accident was when Brittany sauntered up to the beach in a next to nothing bikini, causing Santana to nearly fall from her lifeguard chair. Never failing to make the Latina blush a crimson red, Brittany catwalked up the dock before diving gracefully into the water, splashing playfully at the campers who tried to climb all over her. At the end of the day Tom would blow his whistle and everyone would clear out of the water. Like clockwork, Santana would tell him she'd wrap up for the day, and he would shrug his thanks before heading off to his cabin.

When she said wrap up she meant 'swim with Brittany for a little before she wrapped up', but that was a minor detail. They would splash around, laughing at nothing or everything, and a few times Santana even pulled Brittany into the boat shed to teach her some important things about "CPR". One time Santana had even jumped into the water and surfaced behind Brittany, where she quickly tugged the strings of her bikini top, causing the blonde to shriek and Santana to grin widely before swimming for her life. She paid for it later that night in the best way possible.

They ignored the talk about the summer coming to an end. Or at least Santana did. She found herself extremely interested in her food when conversations at meals turned towards plans for the fall. Brittany on the other hand, joined right in, talking about school and getting back to cheerleading. Santana played with her food and ignored the thoughts of school and going home and leaving camp, leaving camp people. Brittany would give the Latina's knee a little squeeze under the table, but it only made the lump in Santana's throat grow.

* * *

Santana faced her half packed bags and the piles of clothes still on the floor.  _Shit_. The summer had really flown, and she would have never expected it to go the way it did.

The last day of camp was always a 'free' day, where the campers were supposed to pack their whole summers back up and be ready to leave the next morning. Staff members didn't leave until the day after. The last dinner at camp was always special – the counselors and staff members waited on the tables, serving the meal in courses. Campers always got a kick out of it.

Dinner time rolled around and Santana made her way over to the dining hall. She saw Brittany standing at the end of a table and quickly went to stand at the end of the table next to her. Brittany smirked at her and mouthed "subtle". Santana rolled her eyes and turned to face the table of 13 year old boys she'd be waitressing for. They howled and she quickly glared at them, silencing even the counselors.

Once everyone was seated, things became a blur of food, pitchers of bug juice, and napkins. Lots of napkins. The dining hall was filled with an unusually loud buzz of chatter accompanied by the clinking of silverware. Brittany caught Santana's eye and stifled a laugh at the Latina, whose hair had bits of food in it. Santana could only smile and shrug. She tilted her head towards the door and Brittany gave a small nod.

In the fray that serving hundreds of rowdy kids creates, the girls slipped from the dining hall easily. They headed back to Santana's room flicking bits of food that clung to them at each other, their giggles ringing across camp. Brittany pulled Santana into the room and pushed her up against the closed door. Santana's giggles died down as Brittany's eyes searched hers, their bodies now pushed flush together. The blonde dipped her head down slowly and brought her lips to Santana's.

Santana's hands cupped Brittany's neck as she pushed back into the kiss, her brow furrowed as she hoped Brittany could feel her; feel her putting herself  _raw_ into this kiss. Eventually Brittany pulled back, letting her lips linger near Santana's. She smiled brightly.

"I am literally  _covered_  in food."

The darker girl chuckled.

"I need to shower. But there might be some hard to reach places…" she paused, allowing an impish grin to take over her features. Santana smiled and raised her eyebrows, letting Brittany continue. She too busy regulating her breathing to respond, anyways.

"Well I figure I need someone to, you know, help get those tricky spots" Brittany continued, her voice low as her hands found Santana's waist and slipped under the hem of her shirt. Santana licked her lips.

"I might be able to help," she managed.

Brittany smirked and backed away towards the bathroom, never taking her eyes off Santana. "You could also use some, uh, washing up." Brittany motioned to her hair, indicating the food still stuck in Santana's. The blonde peeled her shirt from her body and turned her back to Santana to turn the shower on. Slowly she unclasped her bra, throwing a seductive look over her shoulder at Santana as she moved to slip out of her pants.

The look was enough to snap Santana out of her trance, and although watching Brittany was its own treat, Santana began to undress herself as well. She advanced on Brittany and kissed her hard, loving the heat their naked bodies generated against each other. She stepped forward, backing Brittany up into the shower, and let out a little shiver as the water crashed over them.

Santana broke the kiss momentarily to pull the curtain closed behind them before returning to Brittany, pushing her up against one of the shower walls, her kisses turning hungry and urgent. Brittany let out a small moan as Santana cupped her breasts, massaging them gently and running her thumbs over her nipples. The darker girl kissed down Brittany's neck, savoring the warmth of her skin, the feel of it under her hands and mouth, and the small gasps Brittany let out when she moved in just the right way. One of her hands trailed down the blonde's abs, making its way further down to –

"Santana?"

Santana froze, her heart skipping at least two beats. A voice that was not Brittany's had just called her name. A distinctively male voice called her name again from her room. The bathroom door was open, there was someone in her room, and Brittany was in the shower with her.  _Fuck_. Santana motioned for Brittany to move back and be quiet.

The Latina poked her head out from behind the curtain, holding it up to cover her body as Brittany stood as far back in the corner of the shower as she could.

"Hello? Who's there?" Santana called, hoping her voice conveyed her annoyance and masked her anxiety.

"Santana? Hey…this is awkward." Santana's eyes widened as Tom stood in the doorway of her bathroom, shuffling his feet. "I, uh, can't find a sweatshirt of mine and was looking to see if you had it." Tom met her wide eyes and waited for her to respond. Santana almost laughed at the scenario.

"Can I root around for it? You may have noticed my room's a mess, maybe I'll find it while I'm packing up."

Tom nodded. "Sure. Thanks." He turned to leave. "Sorry I interrupted your shower." Santana only nodded, more concerned with getting Tom out of her room before he discovered just how good of a shower he had really interrupted. Santana listened for the door to close and allowed herself to relax. Brittany giggled.

"That was close," she murmured as she pulled Santana back towards her.

Santana could only mumble a small "yeah" in return. She leaned her head forward onto Brittany's shoulder. Any desire to pick up where she had left off had faded.

"Britt, I'm sorry – that just totally killed it for me."

Brittany pouted before drawing Santana's attention to her. She wrinkled her nose and kissed the darker girl softly, then pulled back smiling and picked up a bottle of shampoo. "Well, I'd still like to shower, if that's okay with you."

Santana smiled. "That's more than okay with me."

* * *

The campers left early the next morning. Santana hugged her favorite (not that she'd admit that to anyone) campers goodbye, and waved the buses off with the rest of the staff. Once the buses pulled away, leaving large clouds of dust in their wake, the director instructed everyone to start cleaning. Wherever they worked – had to be clean. Wherever they slept – had to be clean. A few people groaned and everyone split up.

Tom, Santana, and the other members of the waterfront walked down towards the lake and started pulling in all the buoys and any other attachments in the water. They stowed the boats, canoes, and life vests. It took them a couple of hours to get everything fully stored and locked in the shed, and Tom let out a whoop and started clapping once they were done. Santana gave a small smile as the others joined in. She was just happy to be done. With the waterfront, at least. It had been a safe and awesome summer, which was a success by her, and her director's standards.

She walked back to her room after telling Tom she didn't think she had his sweatshirt. Santana had packed everything except her sheets on her bed, the clothes she would wear tomorrow, and her toiletries. Her room was spotless otherwise and she lay down on her bed, telling herself she had earned a nice nap. Santana rolled over and was asleep in minutes.

It was only luck that woke Santana up a few minutes before their last dinner. She has slept a few hours and woke with a start, looking at her phone for the time. Santana splashed some water on her face and walked over to the dining hall, excited for the fancy meal the chefs prepared for the staff members once all the kids had left. She sat with Jen, Brittany, and Samantha, and tried to let herself just enjoy the night. Their conversations were tinged with sadness – none of them wanted to leave the next day. Santana watched Brittany laugh at something Jen said and felt something twist in her stomach. She turned back to Sam who had been watching her. Her friend gave her a sympathetic smile and Santana rolled her eyes at her.

Later that night Brittany came to Santana's room as usual. Santana slid over in bed and made room for Brittany who joined her under the covers. Her touch was familiar and different at the same time. The same energy that had come over camp in the last few days seemed to resonate between them. Charging every move with something extra. They didn't speak and Santana let herself fall into Brittany's command, returning her kiss and shedding her clothing at the smallest motion from the blonde.

Eventually Santana found herself on top of Brittany, rocking against the girl's hand underneath her. Brittany had her bottom lip between her teeth as she looked up at Santana, who slowly opened her eyes to meet crystal blue ones. Santana let a whimper escape her lips and leaned forward. She rested her forehead on Brittany's and felt something rushing up, rushing out of her, there was no way to stop it and she didn't know if she wanted to –

"I love you," she breathed out, closing her eyes as the words flew past her lips. Brittany's lips met hers instantly and her hand pressed up against Santana, causing the girl to cry out as she neared release. Brittany released her lips and continued working the darker girl, whose hair enveloped both their faces. As Santana continued to rock against Brittany's hand, the blonde leaned up so that her mouth was against Santana's ear.

"I love you too," Brittany said softly as she brought Santana over the edge. Santana let out a great sigh and her body slumped forward as Brittany continued to rub gently, working the last of her orgasm through her. Santana shuddered with pleasure and let herself slide off of Brittany onto the bed as she regained her ability to think. Brittany brushed the hair from Santana's face and smiled at her, causing the darker girl to blush slightly.

Santana draped a hand over Brittany's stomach and pulled herself closer to the blonde, kissing her shoulder. They lay in silence for a while, each girl thinking about their quiet declarations.

"I meant it, you know" Santana murmured, deciding as she spoke that she indeed,  _had_  meant it.

"I know," Brittany replied. She grinned at the expression on Santana's face. "Well, I did!" The dancer insisted. Santana scoffed but didn't deny it. She just buried her head in Brittany's shoulder as the girl let out a small laugh and kissed the top of her head.

Santana fought the sleep that pressed down on her, not wanting to have to wake up to sad farewells. Brittany continued to stroke her hair, scattering the strokes with soft kisses as she too felt sleep overcome her.

Finally Santana relaxed and allowed herself to drift off to sleep.

* * *

There was a bus that morning for everyone who needed to get to the airport. Everyone else either had their own car or was getting a ride from someone. Sam and Brittany helped each other drag their bags to the bus while Santana was allowed to drive her car up to her door and load her bags from there. Dan had been walking by and offered to help, saying it was only right to end the summer the same way they started. Afterwards Santana drove her car back to the parking lot and got out. Everyone was gathering around the bus, hugging, loading last minute bags, and saying their last farewells.

Santana leaned against her car, arms crossed, and watched Brittany hug her friends. Sam and Jen came over to Santana and gave her a hug – Sam's lasted a tick longer than usual, and she may have squeezed a little tighter too – before moving on through the crowd.

Brittany continued to hug people, exchange phone numbers, and tell people to keep in touch. Santana smiled to herself at how popular the girl was. The blonde made eye contact with Santana briefly before someone else tapped her shoulder to embrace her.

They hadn't talked about their plans after the summer, but after last night, Santana didn't know if they had to. Sure, they were going to be hours, miles apart, attending different schools, but Santana thought it safe to say they both knew they weren't done. Even so, Santana felt tears threaten her cool demeanor. She decided she better say goodbye before the waterworks got to be too much. Santana pushed away from her car and strode as calmly as she could over to Brittany.

"I'm gonna say 'goodbye' now, 'kay?"

Brittany jutted out her bottom lip but nodded. "'Kay"

Santana hugged Brittany, squeezing her tightly as she wrapped her arms around her. "I'll miss you," she whispered.

"Me too," Brittany responded. Santana couldn't miss the sadness in her tone, it reached deep inside her and she cursed herself for even being part of the reason Brittany sounded that way. Santana stepped back from Brittany, eyeing the ground and shuffling her feet in the dirt. People still swarmed around them, "goodbyes" echoing in their ears.

"Well, I'll see you then…" Santana trailed off, meeting Brittany's gaze. The blonde gave an almost imperceptible nod. Santana's hand lingered on Brittany's waist and her brow furrowed. Brittany was almost turning away from her before she pulled her back, rocked forward on her toes, and captured Brittany's lips with hers.

Brittany's eyebrows raised in surprise but she met Santana's kiss readily, pulling the Latina closer to her. Somewhere behind her Santana heard Tom let out a loud "Oh, shit", and Sam may have squealed. Santana only kissed Brittany harder, her hand coming to rest around Brittany's neck.

"Call me when you get back?" Santana asked as she eventually pulled back, her eyes not daring to leave Brittany's.

"Mhm. You too, 'kay?"

Santana nodded. Finally she turned away from Brittany, keeping her head held high as she headed back to her car. She felt quite a few sets of eyes trailing her but kept her step strong and steady. Once in the car, she revved the engine and pulled out of the parking lot, up the path, and out onto the road. Santana sniffed loudly and wiped her face, just happy with herself that she made it out of eyeshot without breaking.

Later in the trip, as she passed through the first small town, her phone buzzed with a text, and she checked it at the next red light.

_-I might miss you already._

Santana rolled her eyes but grinned from ear to ear just the same. She tapped out a quick response before the light turned green.

_-Well you're in luck, I just might miss you back._


	12. Epilogue

The bell rang and Santana was the first one out of class. The halls filled behind her as she grabbed her books from her locker, making sure she had everything she'd need for Christmas break. Santana swung her backpack over her shoulder and walked briskly towards the door. Not only was it winter break, but Brittany had flown in today and would be visiting for a few days. Santana's mom said she could pick her up from the airport since Santana would still be in school when she got in.

Santana's mother thought she was just picking up one of Santana's camp friends. Santana hadn't had the nerve to tell her parents just how friendly she actually was with Brittany, for fear of giving them a heart attack. She didn't think they would hate her or kick her out or anything like that, she just wasn't ready to start waving any rainbow flags in their faces, or in general. Sure, she had started noticing girls more;  _no one_  could deny the allure of a cheerleaders uniform, or those super short skirts that sophomore clique sported on a regular basis, but she wasn't about to call up Degeneres and ask for a membership card.

The closest she had gotten to any of that "pride" stuff was putting her name down on a sign-up sheet for the gay/straight alliance group at her school. The boy behind the table had smiled at her and she snapped at him not to expect her at any meetings or any of that crap. He only shrugged and thanked her for signing up. Later that week she was walking down the hall and saw Jake, the dumbass center for their basketball team, backing the GSA table kid towards an empty classroom, and it hadn't looked like it was for a friendly conversation about their upcoming game against Central.

Before she knew what she was doing she had thrown herself between them, asking Jake if his coach knew what he had been up too that weekend, because Santana was sure he'd love to hear all about his record setting keg stands. Jake had snarled and stared over her shoulder at the wide-eyed boy before finally muttering something that sounded like "fag hag" and walking away. The boy, whose name turned out to be Paul, thanked her and said she might actually like some of the events the GSA hosted. Santana shrugged and told him not to worry about it, and that  _maybe_  she'd come to a meeting or something.

Now, with everything and anything school related pushed from her mind, Santana drove home as fast as she could. She had barely put the car in park before she was out the door and bursting into her house. Her mom poked her head out of the kitchen and told her that Brittany was upstairs. Santana raced upstairs and opened the door to her room, dropping her backpack by her dresser. She closed the door behind her and was nearly tackled over by the lanky girl that had been sitting on her bed.

"Hi! Hi. Hi." Brittany repeated over and over, squeezing Santana tightly as she staggered backwards. Santana was smiling so hard her face hurt.

"Hi," she replied, pulling Brittany off her just enough to kiss her hard on the lips. Brittany smiled as Santana wrapped her arms around her waist, pulling their bodies even closer together. "I've missed you," Santana whispered against her lips.

Brittany tugged Santana's bottom lip with her teeth before giving her a quick peck. "I've missed you too." She stepped back and sat down on Santana's bed. Santana kicked off her shoes and joined the blonde.

"How was the flight?" Santana asked as she lay down.

"It was fine. Except for the smelly guy I sat next to." Brittany curled up next to Santana, allowing the darker girl to wrap her arm around her stomach. Santana kissed the back of Brittany's neck as she snuggled closer. The girls stayed like that, talking about their schools and classes and friends, until Santana's mom called up the stairs that it was time for dinner.

Santana's parents asked Brittany all the usual questions about school, her family, any extra curriculars she participated in. The darker girl smiled into her food as she watched her…her  _girlfriend_  meet her parents. Santana could tell that her parents liked the blonde and gave Brittany's thigh a small squeeze under the table. The only blip in the meal came when Santana's dad asked if Brittany had a boyfriend. Brittany blushed and Santana's mother scoffed ("George! Like she wants to talk about that stuff with you") and Santana had to excuse herself as she choked on her water ("Ay! Santana are you okay?").

When she returned to the table, still red-faced, they were already cleaning up. Santana helped put everything away and Santana's mom suggested they go get ice cream. Brittany yawned and said she was exhausted from the flight, and would probably be fine with just passing out early tonight. The girls thanked Santana's parents for dinner and went back upstairs, where they did anything but pass out early.

Santana smiled as Brittany writhed beneath her, turning her face into her pillow to muffle her moans, not wanting to draw any untimely attention to Santana's room. Late into the night the girls collapsed into each other, limbs tangled in a sweaty and satisfied mess. They fell asleep with small smiles on their faces, wrapped in a cocoon of blankets.

The girls spent the next day at the mall, Christmas shopping. They split up to get each other gifts, each girl not wanting the other to see what they were getting. Eventually, Santana spotted Brittany walking towards her, bag in hand, and waved. The blonde smiled instantly which sent some ridiculous, warm, _fuzzy_  feeling coursing through Santana's body. Brittany reached Santana and the darker girl extended her hand.

Brittany beamed and took Santana's hand, lacing their fingers together. They walked through the mall together in silence, enjoying watching the people around them and the festive decorations. There were a few looks thrown their way, but Brittany didn't seem to notice so Santana stomached them, meeting curious eyes with cool brown ones. They came up to the food court and stopped in because Brittany wanted a hot pretzel.

It was a gorgeous, crisp winter day, and the girls went to sit in the small outdoor plaza by the mall. Sitting on a bench, Brittany leaned into Santana as she nibbled on her pretzel and Santana put her arm around her shoulder; pulling her girlfriend close towards her.

Santana rested her head on Brittany's and watched the people walking by them, the couples holding hands and even stealing a quick peck here and there. A warmth blossomed in her stomach that wasn't from the bite of hot pretzel Brittany gave her. She felt relaxed. She felt comfortable and happy; unlike she had ever felt with anyone before. It didn't matter that they lived far apart and went to different schools. They were seniors, and once they both graduated, it was a whole different ball game.

As Brittany nestled her head into the crook of Santana's neck, Santana knew things would work out. She couldn't say how she knew, she just did. It was cheesy and she knew that too, but this summer had been a whirlwind of  _different_ , and she had learned to just roll with it. She placed a gentle kiss on Brittany's head.

_Yeah, they were going to be just fine._


End file.
